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Not addressing the issues

MayCorine851's picture

Since I been with DH, SD has always had behavior/mental issues. We have been together 7yrs and it seems to only get worst. SD is now 15 and has been put out of BM house for running away and consistently trying to fight her. She ended up with us a few months pack "temporarily", but BM refuses to put a plan together as far as custody. My issue at this point is that this child is in my house literally sleeping all day, barely attending virtual school, her room is a horrible mess, she consisty tells DH and Grandmother she is depressed, and who knows if she takes her meds. Recently she mentioned doing self harm also. DH doesn't put any structure on her, allows her to be on her phone and play the game all the time into the morning sometimes. I just don't get why DH doesn't see the damage this is causing. Everytime I say anything it's meet with an attitude by both SD and DH. I have told him several times now that I couldn't do this. It's just too much for me, plus I have two toddlers. This child needs so much help and nobody seems to address it. I just don't know how much longer I can just sit ideally by. I'm always in the back of mind scared she will do something crazy to herself.  

Wicked stepmo.'s picture

When BM refused to address OSDs mental health issues, permittied her to quit counseling after 2 sessions. I waited until it started effecting her schooling. I took that opportunity to email the school social worker and tell her the concerns regarding OSDs mental health.

She scheduled a virtual appointment with OSD then got on BM insisting she have her evaluated by a counselor and insisted BM follow up with her on appointments. 

Sometimes it takes pressure from outside sources to get BPs to do anything.

tog redux's picture

Let me guess - DH is also paying BM child support while having the kid in his home all the time?

Hopefully the school will call CPS on them and force them to get her some help. 

ESMOD's picture

You can't care more than the bio parents unfortunately.

I also would have lost all my respect for my husband if he didn't take a more active role in helping his struggling child.  He is her father, he should be getting her help.

I would be looking at an exit plan because is this the kind of person you thought you would marry? one who doesn't care enough to help his child?

Harry's picture

An live in hospital for a few weeks to get a line on her illness.   Once ever other week is not going to cut it.  If BF and BM don't care there nothing you can do.  Because they are not going to make her, keep track of her medications.