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Court findings (BM/BF)

Cookieboom's picture

BM stated to judge that DS is afraid of BF as he feels that BF’s arrest was his fault, thinks BF is a psycho and she can’t convince him otherwise.  Judge was like, ummmm yes you can convince him otherwise. CRICKETS


BM stated that DS does not want to go to BF’s house because he feels unimportant as BF calls me, has me come over (Which is a lie), texts me and spends his free time with me when not with DS; which DS “doesn’t like.”  Judge said it doesn’t matter that DS doesn’t like it, he’s 13.   BM then stated that she “did the right thing” and broke up with her BF for the sake of their son and BF needs to do the same.  BF Lawyer interrupted, “My understanding is that your BF is married, you ran off with him for a year and he went back to his wife.”  CRICKETS


BF's Lawyer brought up that BM used the excuse that I am a nurse and she is afraid of DS getting coronavirus and that she won’t let BF have DS until we break up.  Judge said that is “baseless” and asked her if I am threatening to her or DS in anyway, she answered no.  Judge said she doesn’t care about the fact that I am a nurse and ordered BF to see DS.  BM then stated, “You can’t do that, he will kidnap DS and leave the country!”  Judge stated that BF seems like a great dad and she doesn’t see him doing that.  CRICKETS


Judge ordered the attorneys to work out a new custody agreement.  


Winterglow's picture

Oh how wonderful! LOL! I just love posts like this!

This just made my day and restored my faith in humanity.

Thumper's picture


Nice to read good news for a change.

Cookieboom's picture

Thank you!! BF feels like a weight has been lifted off of his shoulders and finally has a great legal team.  The attorneys to work out a new custody agreement, so he is not out of the woods yet.  We are hoping that a new custody agreement is in writing soon!

simifan's picture

While I like the smack down, that judge did you a huge disservice by not giving an order directly. With a HCBM, she won't agree to anything reasonable. Your DH will wind up back in court. 

Cookieboom's picture

I Agee, he is not out of the woods yet and has discussed this with his lawyers.    Both lawyers have nurses in their family and were appalled that she used my profession to keep DS away.  Overall BF feels like a weight has been lifted off of his shoulders and finally has a voice.  The attorneys are hoping to work out a new custody agreement.  We are hoping that a new custody agreement is in writing soon! BTW her lawyer seemed totally unprepared at the hearing, it appeared that BM kept her in the dark for a lot of things...

The_Upgrade's picture

“My understanding is that your BF is married, you ran off with him for a year and he went back to his wife.”  CRICKETS

Wow hahahahahahaha

Rags's picture

Great outcome.

I am surprised that the Judge did not issue the order verbally from the bench and then instruct one of the attories to write it up for the Judge's signature.

Even with a clear order issued by our Judge, it took a couple of clarification trips back to the Judge before we had the final signed order.  The Judge got pissed at us and at the SpermClan.  Firtst at us for not surrendering the Skid to the SpermGrandParents.  The Judge had to clarify that the transportation of the Skid for SpermClan visitation was at their discretion.  The first post CO visitation no one called to arrange transport so when the SpermGPs showed up, we told them they did not have visitation and to get off of our property.  Their attorney had to make an emergency request to the Judge to clarify transportation.   That required a modificaiton to the CO and a second signature from the Judge.  Less than two weeks later we had make our own emergency request to the Judge for a clarification.  They refused to return the Skid on schedule claiming that travel time was on our time.  The Judge had to modify the CO again to clarify that visitation began at pick up and ended at exactly the same time X days later.  The SpermClan was playing stupid that they returned the Skid the day after their visitation ended and not on the day their visitation ended.  

So, ultimately, the Judge signed the original order then two following orders with his clarificaitons included.

That order stood for 9 years. We had to threaten court several times in that 9 years but they always folded because they knew that we had all of our i's doted and t's crossed.

I would advise that you not let the two lawyers work it out. It will cost you a fortune and BM will in all likelihood refuse to accept it anyway.  I would suggest that you instruct your attorney to go back to the Judge directely for him to issue an order.  That limits the clarification points that you will get billed for by your attorney.  

Once the CO is finalized and signed, learn it backwards, forwards, upside down, and sideways. Also research any supplemental county rules and state regulations that govern visitation, support, etc....  A CO does not necessarily provide every information point that can be used to manage the blended family opposition.

We smacked them with a rolled up copy of the CO, a rolled up copy of the supplemental county rules, and rolled up copy of State regulations any number of times in the 9 years the original/clarified order was in play.  

Then we went for a CS modification and we pretty much went through the same process again.  Only the clafiications from the Judge were all to smack the Spermidiot into line.


Maxwell09's picture

This!! A thousand times, this! BM took my DH for custody modification back in May (served in December) and although very few changes were made, DH has gone back to court for clarification issues that are still not agreed upon five times. Six counting the newest rescheduled date for next month. 

I hate to say it but it's not over. She will fight to the death to get what all that she wants and leaving y'all with what she thinks is fitting unless a judge steps in and decrees otherwise.