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Carrying gun, medical weed, & assault

futurestepmomnowstepgf's picture

It has been a while since I have posted about this friend (SM) but that is in part because I told my friend in a nice way that in regards to their custody situation if they aren't going to file or pursue anything to try and switch custody then to stop wasting energy talking about it/asking for advice on it all the time. I really said it very nicely, but that is the gist of what I meant.

So on to a new update on my friend (SM)'s situation. Since summertime, SM and her DH have not been trying to pursue a change of custody for SD (7) basically because the DH did not want to start conflict, he was leaving for 3 months to go to a training school for the military, SM works 11-13 hour days sometimes, and honestly the DH did not want to get involved in a custody battle. So yesterday SM calls me and asks me if I know anything about medical marijuana and gun laws. She went on to tell me how the BM in their situation is apparently now smoking medical marijuana, carrying a gun, talking about weed in front of SD, constantly always high and either yelling at her new husband or playing video games, etc. Apparently BM's mom texted SD's father (SM's DH) and said how they came to visit the grandma and she was worried about SD's safety and filled him in on the gun, weed, etc. I told SM that unless BM's mom is willing to testify against her daughter in a custody case and/or report her daughter to CPS or police than those things really can't help her DH win custody because he was not a witness to any of it. BM's mom several times has texted SD's father (SM's DH) and said about how unstable BM is, neglect, etc. but when it comes down to it, the mom will not testify against her daughter because she is afraid of her. I left the phone call at telling her, 1. you need BM's mom to testify/report BM, 2. You need lots of evidence of a change of circumstances and that SD is not thriving with BM, 3. You need to look up the gun laws and marijuana laws for BM's state.

Bf and I went to see a movie yesterday for the first time since January and when I came out of the theater SM had texted me that BM had been arrested for assault and battery between our phone call earlier and now. Apparently BM hit her mother and step dad so they called the cops on her and BM is currently sitting in jail. Then this morning I wake up to "if BM is still in jail tomorrow (11/23) then DH is allowed to go and get SD.

So now on to why I posted, BM got arrested in the state the grandma lives, not her home state, and the DH is on an out of state custody schedule. I was going to advise my friend that they should file for an emergency custody hearing immediately if they want to try and get the custody switched at least until they can get a legit hearing, but that they still will need BM's mom to testify against her daughter, etc. Anyone else have any other advice for my friend or is my advice not even correct?

Comments

lieutenant_dad's picture

Sounds pretty solid as far as advice goes. Though, I think at this point, you just need to say "we've not dealt with this, you'll need to ask an attorney these questions."

My guess is that she's less looking for advice and more looking to vent, but doesn't want to come off as just being pissy because most folks would tell her "you need to fix the situation and not just complain about it." Perhaps let her know that it's okay for her to vent to you, that she doesn't need to just come to you for advice. Even consider sending her this way.

futurestepmomnowstepgf's picture

early this morning. The BM goes before a judge this afternoon and should be released. Since the assault and battery was not against SD the lawyer doesn't think an emergency hearing will be a slam dunk, but should rather file for a change of custody.

Apparently BM has a DUI and domestic record already so it might not be a pretty picture for BM, but who knows what the judge will say.

I kind of wasn't as willing to let her continue to vent before because they kept venting, but never doing anything about it. Looks like this time they will and if so, then vent away! Yeah I'll consider telling her to come on here, but I would delete my posts about her first because I don't know how she'd feel about it.

Thumper's picture

This caught my eye...

Apparently BM has a DUI and domestic record already so it might not be a pretty picture for BM, but who knows what the judge will say.

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BM wont loose custody over this OP.  The state would have to file felony charges AND she would have to be in the clinker UNABLE to make bond before custody change in a temp form.

I know a bm, cough cough who was arrested and the dad was never told. It was kept hush hush. Even the church going BM's mom (wolf in sheep clothing)  kept dad 100percent out of that loop. Her next arrest had a different outcome..

Hey, come to think of us, you could suggest to your friend to have bio dad contact CPS in bm's town to make his presence known to them,,,name, address, phone number contacts just in case bm is hauled off in the back of a paddy wagon. BM's tend to report to cps that bio dad is unknown, whereabouts unknown so cps usually places child with BM's parents.

Oh that goes for BM's making the same bull shit statements to the irs too. In case you didnt know.

Family Courts need to wake up. Poor kids involved in the cross fire.

advice.only2's picture

"I know a bm, cough cough who was arrested and the dad was never told. It was kept hush hush. Even the church going BM's mom (wolf in sheep clothing) kept dad 100percent out of that loop. Her next arrest had a different outcome.."

this sounds like Meth Mouth and GrandHag, when Meth Mouth got arrested in Utah we had no clue and her parents hid it from DH. When Meth Mouth got busted here in CA the cop who arrested her called DH because she fought while she was getting arrested and pissed him off.

Thumper's picture

Thats what they do advice.only. It makes me sick. Gosh forbid they loose the hefty cs amounts. How else will they help support their habit?

 

 

 

 

tog redux's picture

The federal government really doesn't care about BM having a gun and using medical marijuana. If they did, they would need to hire a whole lot more people to enforce that. Those kinds of laws are used to take down gangs and drug dealers, not to prosecute moms who have legal guns and legal medical marijuana. 

She won't lose custody, most likely. 

 

futurestepmomnowstepgf's picture

federal government will care or she will lose custody over that. I think my friend SM and her DH are just trying to prove that BM is unstable by using several examples in court. Between her being arrested for assault and battery against her mom and step dad in front of SD, BM smoking canabis while carrying a gun, etc.

As BM already has a domestic and DUI on her record, she is possibly facing jail time so hopefully that is what happens so at least for a bit they can take SD, but who knows, depends on the judge

Kashanu's picture

In fact, the situation is quite confusing. It is best to contact a lawyer with extensive experience. There are many facts that should be taken into account, so I really do not see any other solution to your problem, except as an experienced lawyer who knows all the features of the law of the state in which you live. I somehow faced the problem of storing kratom capsules from https://kratommystic.com, but it was easily solved. Weed is much more complicated, but I'm sure you can handle it. Nowadays many people are faced with this problem, so you shouldn't worry about it. He should worry about possession of weapons, as well as murder, this is a really big problem.