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Kids in college now

Daisymazy2's picture

Whatever happened to enjoying your freedom and spending as much time away from mom and dad as possible???  Hanging out with friends on the weekends?

SD, age 18,  she is in college literally 10 miles from my house. She doesn't have a driver's license so she doesn't have a car.  She never cared to get her driver's license.  The college is out of the middle of nowhere close to a VERY small town so there isn't any public transporation.  Walking the 3 or 4 miles into town just wouldn't do for SD.  She has to call DAAAADDDDYYY almost every weekend to take her out so she isn't bored.  

Friend of mine lives out West.  His BS, age, 19,  goes to college about 2 to 3 hours away from home.  BS comes home at least twice a month for the weekends.  Friend was thinking about moving to another state about 12 hours away.  Friend says that once BS finishes the semester he will transfer to a local college in the new state.  WHY????  Friend feels that BS is too young to leave behind.  BS  says he is going to med school soon in a little over 2 years. The talk that I am hearing now is that BS MAY not be going to med school unless he gets accepted to one closer to home (wherever that may be).

When my BS was 19, he joined the Air Force and was stationed over 1200 miles away from home.  He has been stationed in over 4 different states and also was station in S Korea for a year all before his 24th birthday.  He TRIES to come home once a year at Christmas.  He is enrolled in college and will finished his degree in another 2 years.  

Comments

advice.only2's picture

I don't understand why kids don't want to get their licenses now a days. I couldn't wait to get mine, it meant freedom! BS got his at 16 and BD14 is chomping at the bit to go driving. Maybe for your SD it's a way of keeping DH focused on her this way he has to keep being involved in her drama.

Daisymazy2's picture

My boys with the exception of my youngest did get their license when they were 16.  My youngest has high functioning autism and my XH and I thought it would be best for him to wait a couple of years to get his.  He has his now. 

I never understood why SD doesn't want to get her license.  I don't understand why she didn't go to the college in town that has access to public transportation.  DH does have to drop "EVERYTHING" whenever she calls.  

advice.only2's picture

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Rumplestiltskin's picture

If DH stops dropping everything to be her taxi, she will either be forced to drive or entertain herself! It's like a version of why buy the cow when you're getting the milk for free. 

Lndsy747's picture

I don't get the mindset either I have a long ways to go because DD is only 3 but I look forward to seeing her launch someday and succeed on her own. 

SD is 18 and doesn't have a license but always an excuse why like she's too busy (doing what?!?!) Or doesn't have the money for the test/license (like $50 total). I think I'm my case BM likes to keep her dependant on her and has completely hobbled her.

Exjuliemccoy's picture

It comes down to the parenting, doesn't it? Weak/helicopter parents don't produce kids that are self reliant or confident.

We see A LOT of stunted kids on this site, and while divorce can be a component, the substandard parenting usually goes way back before that.