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looking for a book that may help with my issues...

may927's picture

Hello everyone,

My one year old BS and I are leaving next week to stay with my parents across the country for the rest of the summer.  Due to Covid, it has become too complicated to continue with shuttling my husband's kids back and forth.  I also struggle with sharing my small space, especially when the kids aren't able to stay socially busy because of social distancing expectations.  

Although I actually have a not so awful situation with DH and my stepkids, I've struggled with the situation, definitely due in part to my own past issues, which I work with a therapist on.   I've noticed in the past when I've visited my family, it's hard for me to know my husband is just living with SD 15 and (sometimes since  she's in college most of the year) SD 20 and having a nice time while Im away.  I'm looking for a book that I can read while I'm away that may help with this issue.  I think it's a great opportunity for me to get a break and feel some peace and just enjoy sharing my baby with my family which I don't get as often as I'd like.  So I'm looking for book suggestions (no Stepmomster though!) to help me get through without feeling resentful.   Thanks!  

Aunt Agatha's picture

Stepmonster was the only step parenting book that helped me and O read (or started at least) several.

Not sure why you've called out that book as something you won't read?

Or are you looking less for step parenting and more for general books?  

Kes's picture

Agree with Agatha - there are a serious dearth of good books on the subject of step parenting, apart from Stepmonster.  Sure there are ones that suggest you get into a circle with your SKIDs and sing Kumbaya, but that's about it.  If you're looking for novels or something, then that's different. 

Dovina's picture

Stepmonster is a good read for step families. Perhaps OP has read this.

There should be a book out there called "Confessions of a Mini Wife" now that would be a best seller on this site!!

BethAnne's picture

I am not really sure what you are struggling with. It sounds like some sort of fear of missing out or being jelous that they have a better time while you are not there than when you are there?

If it is these things then I would find some good fiction (or unrelated non-fiction if that is your thing) and induldge yourself. Find ways to enjoy yourself and your time with your family. Do the things that you can't do when you husband and sk's are around. Eat food they wouldn't eat. Do things that are wholy focused on your baby. If your relatives can baby sit, spoil yourself with some quality time dedicated to you, visiting your favorate places or doing your favorate things. Watch movies that you wouldn't normally watch at home. Focus on your time and enjoyment so that when you hear that they are having a good time it doesn't eat away at you so much as you are also enjoying yourself.