You are here

BM finally got called on her bs

ladybug3's picture

DH and BM had a skype call with SS's principal, vice principal, teacher, and a school counselor. DH and the teacher both agreed on SS's learning and behavioral issues and they requested that he be held back from 1st grade. SS took a test that placed his academic age at 4 year old and he's almost 6, so it would probably benefit him to be held back and helped more.

Then BM chimed in that SS does fine at her house. He does his schoolwork well, doesn't have hardly any issues outside what is considered normal, and she doesn't experience behavioral issues from him. DH didn't say a word because the teacher actually called her on her bs. 

"There's no way SS is acting one way in school and at DH's house and a completely different way at your house. You need to accept the fact that SS is struggling and do more to help him instead of ignoring the problem." 

When DH told me about it I swear my jaw dropped open. This is a female teacher telling a MOM that she needs to cut the sh*t, and defending DH. Excuse me while I take a minute to process this.

Also I'm very excited because DH decided yesterday that SS needs to see a therapist and get tested for ADHD and any other learning disability he may have. He also wants him to see a therapist for his separation anxiety and other emotional problems. I'm so happy we can finally move things in the right direction for SS.

Per the CO DH can schedule any non-emergency appointments for SS that he deems necessary as long as he informs BM about them. So she can continue to ignore SS's issues if she wants but DH is making sure he gets the help he needs.


justmakingthebest's picture

Your SS's teacher is AMAZING!!! I love when they finally get sick of parents treating the kids like they can do no wrong/ there is nothing wrong and actually slap them with a little truth!!

Hopefully DH can get those appointments scheduled and get him the help and tools/medication that he needs to do better in life.

Cover1W's picture

I know!  When YSD was in 4th grade, she was having issues doing her work and getting really, really easy assingnments turned in.  She always said she didn't have anything or had finished it.  I told DH he needed to actually get into her backpack, open the folder and check it.  He never, ever did because "violation of her personal space" ... 4th grade.

The teacher finally called out both DH and BM in an email stating the EXACT same thing I had been saying.  Of course, teacher was listened to...that's when I disengaged from schoolwork help.

sorigor's picture

oh my, i just had this issue with 16 year old ss. caused us so many fights. he would stay out with gf and expect my help when he got home.He lied every day about his work. not just about work he lies about everything bc parents have allowed this.  I finally deleted teacher text from my phone and tried to totally ignore work, but then ss would come to me for help. I would spend hours helping bc I am a teacher and kills me to see a parent just let a kid fail. ( his dad and mom who give zero help) but he would lie and say he did his work or he was passing. he started living with us 6 months ago. Yall it is so much. i just feel i can't anymore. i actually drove to school playground to cry and get away right now. he just let son take his truck and drive he only has permit no license (bc he kept failing the test)  If he wrecks, it goes on my insurance. Did I mention my husband works nights. I have a responsible daughter. I feel i am about to explode. we have an 18 months together Sad  ss has caused us to fight so many times by lying (intentionally) 

JRI's picture

You sound like such a kind, responsible person, Songor.  I can " hear" the suffering in your voice.  I looked but couldn't see any blogs entries for you.  Have you read thru the Disengagement area of the forums?  I bet that would help you.  Hope you'll let us know how things go.  Many others have had those feelings.  Much empathy for you.

thinkthrice's picture

you are giving me flashbacks!!

Currently the housesHitter is approximately 6-7 years behind his age, so it is a cumulative effect.

 He is 17 now.  When Chef would go to these conferences the school board took the Girhippo's side always.  Chef suggested that the Animal Torturer, SD, be held back in the fourth grade and the Girhippo tearfully protested saying "what about her friends??!!"

Which is odd because the animal torturer is a mean girl bully type and seldom had friends for more than a week or two

At that point we would get a letter from the school district and all the a u t h o r i t i e s saying that the girhippo rules.

Chef was literally told that because the Girhippo was the custodial parent her wishes would always usurp chef

Good for that teacher to see through all the BS or shall I say BM

Thumper's picture

"I dont know WHAT is going on at your house. THEY dont act like that with MEEEEEEEE"


Glad your teacher had the courage to speak up. Its about time. I wish more people would call it what it is.

I bet BM could NOT believe a teacher, a FEMALE,  would not be on her side. BM will have to interview the teachers next time to make sure they are all 'single, man hating MOMS".

Good News Ladybug!!


ladybug3's picture

Haha little did BM know that DH has been in consistent contact with SS's teacher since the beginning of the school year. They are on the exact same page. *happy dance*

strugglingSM's picture

If a teacher had said this to BM (and there were many that should have), she would have threatened to sue and then switched schools. 

When I first met SSs they were in the 3rd grade. I asked one of them how school was and his first reply, "I changed teachers this year, because Mrs. XYZ was mean to mom." I was like, "oh, ok..." That was at the same school that she threatened to sue because the other SS told her that someone hit him. BM ran in to see the principal like a screaming banshee, only to be shown a video of SS hitting himself in the face to make it look like someone hit him. At the end of that school year, SSs moved to a new district. 

Since that time, one or the other kid has changed teachers at two different schools. It's always a different kid and a different teacher...there is only one common denominator - BM!

At their current school, BM is given a wide birth...Skids get out of everything and are allowed to change their entire schedules at the drop of a hat to avoid "mean" teachers. They will be in high school next year and I hope someone at the high school has the balls to stand up to her.