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50/50 custody - going back to court

her.fatal.flaw03's picture

Hello. So my wife has 50/50 custody of her two kids. Took care of the parenting agreement through the divorce attorney. One week on and one week off. Every year, the BD has every holiday. It just happens to always fall on his weeks. He switched weeks with us a long time ago but we didn't even think that this was the reason why. Well this year, he is not allowing them to spend time with us neither Christmas eve or Christmas day. MY QUESTION IS: What does she need to do in order to get it stated in a legal matter that they both get time with the kids on all holidays? No matter who has them that week. Can she file on her own? Like without an attorney and all of that?

tog redux's picture

Technically you are allowed to go Pro Se (without an attorney) and all the forms should be online if you search for your county court.  Some states seem to have easier paperwork than others, and what you are asking for is not unreasonable.  Check out the online forms and decide.  I can't imagine it will be denied, but is he the type to cross-file with some other motion for full custody based on nonsense just to retaliate? If so, then get an attorney.

Panther1's picture

believe it or not things even out.  If he has Christmas eve and Christmas Day in his week, then you have New Years eve and new years day.

Thanksgiving is sometimes early in November and sometimes later in November.

Don't get discouraged, just ride it all out and let the cycle of time just change things.

Panther1's picture

Labor day is always the 1st Monday of September.  The point is that the week on/week off will actually rotate over time and over the years.  

Some holidays are date specific and some are not, it will rotate around.

52 weeks is 364 days only and everyone knows that a year makes up of 365 1/4 or something like that, so time will change it.

tog redux's picture

Just sayin', it's never "early in November".

Eh, I wouldn't wait a couple years to get a holiday with the kids. The jerk is being unfair and this is a woman filing, so no court is going to deny her holiday time with her kids.

tog redux's picture

I understand your point, but clearly the guy is not reasonable or he wouldn't have cooked up this scheme to be sure he had all the holidays. And she shouldn't have to wait years for something the court will fix for her.

You are usually the biggest advocate of how easy it is to file pro se and "win", what gives?

Goodluck's picture

Here is the first step that I would suggest---without going to court: If this does not work GLOVES off.

Send dad a certified, return receipt letter. SIGNATURE required by addressee too.

Request a more fair and balanced holiday visitation schedule. You could add: This MUST BE an over site (don't accuse him yet of being an ass, let a lawyer do that) and YOU are sure that he is willing to find a fair and equal  solution.  YOUR hope is to resolve this by the years end however

add a suspense in letter too. 30days is more than reasonable amount of time he should respond. Keep letter short, professional.  Make a copy for your records and keep all postal documents for your records to.

Just curious why doent mom have full physical custody. Most do, even if they have felonies and various charges in their past.

Just remember if he fails to respond---1. you have a letter showing your desire to work this out TO not waste money and courts time and 2. He looks like a big ass for refusal to keep kid away from parent. File for court and attorney fees if this does go to court. Doubt if you will get it but doesnt hurt to ask.

GoodLuck---Expect dad will say that he already has plans for this year. THAT Is why I suggest that he have odd years (2019) and you have even years. Include spring break, and 1/2 of summers too.


tog redux's picture

50/50 custody is pretty common nowadays.

Good idea on the attempt to ask him to change the schedule.

Panther1's picture

Whenever you send a certified, return receipt letter, Signature required letter, send the exact same letter with no return address through normal standard mail delivery.

Then when the recipient refuses to sign for the certified, RRR letter and you have the proof for the jodge that the father refused to sign for it, you can tell the jodge in court that you mailed the exact same letter, same day, in a blank envelope and the judge will then know that the father got that letter.

Maxwell09's picture

Find out what he wants and trade him for it. Suggest adding a special day (his birthday) or something he's usually doesn't get and be like "you know we should really work on putting more holidays into rotation..."