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DH is Stupid

nana09's picture

Part of me is like "Yes,do you see? I told you so!" and the other part is like "Damn, is he really gonna get it?" and feel sorry for him. And then Im just like "not my kids, My kids aint the ones calling me stupid or calling DH stupid the way SD7 already called me stupid, so not my problem."

SD7 called DH stupid. Idk about you all, but I feel like there is no excuse for that. When I was younger, as much as I wasnt happy with anything my father or his wife said, I could never imagine expressing myself about them in any negative way. In previous blogs I have mentioned how SS9 is also a disrespectful, entitled little brat towards DH. 

DH was so upset.I really wanted to tell him "Now, do you see why I have told you that you need to start being a parent 1st, a friend 2nd? do you see why you need to enforce dicipline, rules, values and most importantly RESPECT? do you see why you need to stop letting them get away with things and stop being so easy on them? Do you see why you need to stop enabling them both? do you see..?do you see...? Do you see?..." but I for once just kept quiet as I am slowly beginning to disengage. As long as I dont gotta deal with this kinda crap from my BioKids, not my problem.



Lady.Tremaine's picture

He was "upset" like upset as in a stern talking to or "upset" as wallowing in pity?

He needs to grow a pair if it was the latter. My DH is Definitely not perfect but this would have been punishment territory

nana09's picture

Im sure that all she is going to get is "the talk" from.her father and call it a day. smh! No punishment, no nothing. I hope i am wrong.

Same thing happened when she told my Son8 that his mom was stupid and he came to me with the hurt in his face. All she got was a talk about how she shouldnt say those things, DH asked BM to talk to her too (which im sure the bitch cared less) and called it a day.

SteppedOut's picture


My formerSO was a shit parent and I lost respect for him. He actually started to disgust me. Hope your husband gets it together. 

Lady.Tremaine's picture

Oh lord. That's disgusting. Calling someone stupid is bad at any age but for a kid that young.. Jesus.

tog redux's picture

The disgusting part is a grown man acting upset that a 7-year-old called him stupid, instead of, you know, being his PARENT.

None of us would have done that with our parents because parents weren't "friends" back then.

ESMOD's picture

Calling dad stupid.. at 7.  Sounds about right.  I mean, I think a lot of kids have pushed these boundaries of respect with their parents.  They see so much on TV where the parents are made out to be bumbling idiots (seems especially men get this "role"). 

Unless this is a super big pattern with a 7 yo.. I think a "talk" followed by a brief timeout to think about respect is a perfectly fine consequence/correction.  If the kid decides to go further down this disrespect rabbit hole.. obviously things can escalate in the consequence department.

I don't think this is end of the world worthy of armageddon.  I don't think it's unusual for kids to say "You are stupid, I hate you" etc.. to their parents when they are upset at them.

It's also not completely unusual for parents to feel a sting when their kid voices displeasure.. but it's the parent's job to establish their authority in the home.. so these transgressions should be clear to the child that they aren't acceptable.

nana09's picture

He always lets her get her way or makes things easy on her. He can say something like "Mamas, lets clean your room." She will say "No! I dont want too!" he will say "C'mon, I will help you", and now shes upset.

The "reason" for her to be "upset" was no reason for her to call her father stupid, in my opinion. 

ESMOD's picture

I'm not saying her "reason" was reasonable.  I'm saying that 7 year olds (kids in general) say things like this.  Not that it's acceptable, but you don't need to whip out the paddle either.

Kids have melt downs that make zero sense.  Have you ever seen that compilation of kid meltdowns?  Kids crying because the ice cream was too cold.  That their parent wouldn't let them keep their pet (dead) squirrel, that their parent broke a slice of cheese in half?  Kids can melt down for a bunch of reasons.. and a LOT are stupid

Dad should obviously deal with this.. but honestly.. a talking to and making her apologize are fine and age appropriate.. maybe with a bit of time out to "think" about what she said.

You can't always apply your logic to a child's

Harry's picture

You must disengage because they will have no respect for you either.  This is not a way to live.  Will your SO figure it out? Who knows some never do.  That what may be ahead of you. He will never figure it out.  And it’s like he one of the friends who lets keep it a secret from Mom ( meaning you )