OT- grandfather passed away, family imploding
My final day at work before "vacation" my boss approaches me. For those who may not remember my blog last year, our entire company is being merged into an existing building in a different city since it was purchased. Current building was being rented by previous company and new company says they have the space to take us on and eliminate rental cost. The final move wasn't supposed to take place until maybe next year due to all of the equipment that needs relocating.
Anyway, boss approaches me and says the new location has an opening in the department that I am currently in. The down side is they want me to transfer by the end of the month, my hours would go from 5a.m.-2:30p.m(sometimes 3). to 7a.m.-3:30p.m.(meaning no more overtime)... oh and they need an answer before I even get back from our camping trip. Also just found out that a majority of the jobs being offered to us for the transfer would be second shift, the complete opposite of what they initially told us. Boss requested an answer before we were even due back from our trip.
With this in the back of my mind, we packed up and left for the trip. Pleasant change of events, the friends that were joining us did pay DH for a portion of the campsite upon arrival. Not half but a decent amount. First night goes well, we got everything set up, had a fire, easy evening. DH had downloaded a "messenger kids" app on SS tablet before the trip and SS chose that night (12 days into the trip with no contact) to message DH at 1:30 a.m.... (no recognition of time zone difference at age 11, oh well at least he messaged). DH was elated that all seemed well and SS was enjoying himself.
The following morning we were woken up at 6:30 a.m... by my DH cell phone ringing. It was my cousin-in-law. My phone was charging with the volume down. She was calling to inform us that my grandfather on my mom's side passed away that morning. Leave it to grandpa to "go out with a bang", as it was July 4th. (this is said with fondness, my grandpa was a veteran)
The rest of the camping trip was overwhelming. DH had driven since we were pulling a camper, we were over two hours away. My snarky cousin was texting and calling me daily, here are some of the gems I was trying to deal with on our five days away:
"your mom hasn't bathed in three weeks and is sleeping with her shoes on, you need to get down here" (you wait to tell me this NOW?? WTH am I supposed to do about it?)
"can you take your mom for a couple of days?" (No, we both work and she can't be left home unsupervised) "Well, don't you have any PTO?" (No, I'm going to be transferring and will have a new boss who doesn't know anything about my mom's mental health, not going to spring that on him the first week)
"rich aunt is telling grandma they have to get ready to sell the house"
"you need to get your mom institutionalized"
My mother is still living with them since all means of affordable housing for someone with mental illness seem to be eluding us and will not return our many phone calls.
"Grandma needs help paying for the funeral, what can you contribute by next week?" (oddly enough they were supposed to go in for a meeting to create a will and get funeral insurance three days after he passed away)
Then after telling her I would help pay the $50 for the guestbook and another $75 for the little cards you pass out at funerals, I received a text last night (same cousin) "I ordered flowers for the funeral and put all of our names on them, 'rich aunt' bought her own, so if you could contribute $50 that would be great because my husband just got fired and I put them on my credit card". So...your husband gets fired (long story, guess it went from 'suspended' to 'fired' in a week), grandma is already freaking out about finances, I offer to cover some things already and now you went out on your own and bought flowers without talking to anyone...and expect everyone to pitch in?? That's not how this works.
I told my boss I would take the transfer...and my transfer date gets pushed up by a week so now I will be starting at the new location in 10 days. I have no idea what to do about my mother. You need to go before a court to have someone committed and I can't see this going over well, not just from my mother but from the new job. I get that she's my mom, but I can't mess up this job.
SS is back home now no issues like I predicted, the chatting via tablet remained pretty steady the rest of his time on the trip as long as it was at 1:30 a.m.. every day. He said he could only go online at the hotel and she kept them super busy.
So...that's life in a nutshell for now. I have no idea what is to come. Oh and BM doesn't want DH to have SS on his weekend this week because we have my grandfather's funeral and she told him "he doesn't need to be seeing that! It's not HIS family!". We'll see how this goes. Not dealing with her this week.