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New baby and of course theres drama

Jcksjj's picture

So I had a new baby Friday. BM was going to keep SD until this weekend. Well she drops her off this morning anyway pretending she was confused about the plan. 

So basically either we look like the bad guys sending her away or I have to help take care of another kid that I wasn't expecting to have this week instead of focusing on my newborn. I'm sure you can all guess what DHs reaction was.


beebeel's picture

I wouldn't care what reaction DH had, he would be finding someone else to watch his kid while I hobbled around on my broken vagina. Eff that.

Jcksjj's picture

She came back and got her but of course I'm the one getting guilt tripped. 

"But I dont mind having her here." Oh yeah because it's about you 3 days after having a baby and major surgery.

Monkeysee's picture

These men are bloody stupid aren’t they? Mine actually suggested the boys attend my delivery because ‘it would be special for them’. I told him if they were anywhere on the hospital grounds while I was in labor we’d be getting divorced. He didn’t see the big deal. Absolute morons.

Jcksjj's picture

Omg. I wouldnt even have my bio kids at delivery...nor would I have wanted to be there when my mom had my brothers.

sunshinex's picture

Haha, my poor SD, 5 at the time, was there at my son's delivery - we had no choice because we had a really unexpected homebirth. Poor kid looked like she wanted to cry and shit her pants all at the same time. I'm pretty sure she had her hands over her ears most of the time - before she ran to her room when I actually started giving birth. I wouldn't subject a kid to that on purpose hahaha 

shamds's picture

invited themselves to my delivery next time i am pregnant, i would tell hubby i am giving birth in Australia where i’m from and if his kids and exwife are dumb enough to fly overseas and rock up at the hospital, i would page the nurses and say they need to get security to evict these people as they’re stalkers and not family...

i can imagine self-entitled miniwife sd’s in front of me  saying to their dad  in a overly fake tone “oh we’re so happy to get another baby sister or brother and we’re gonna be at the hospital” meanwhile the woman cooking this baby in her tummy is ignored and neverr asked permission. If sd’d were dumb enough to ask that, before hubby could answer “eff no!!” Would come iut of my mouth followed by i an giving birth in australia.

skids are not family to the stepmum birthing a child. Its the womans right who she wants there and if she wants privacy or has boundaries they must always be respected. Some of these men are such idiots that they think they can make executive decisions on people that can visit you and bubs in hospital 

SteppedOut's picture

Sorry girl. I get it. I was "expected" to drive my formerSO's kid that treated me like shit to school when I was recovering from a c-section (against dr orders of course). Would have been a 1.5 hour round trip. 

You know, cuz "sometimes you have to help in families". 

I REFUSED and everyone was shocked I would not comply. Didn't I care how the kid felt? 

Jcksjj's picture

The thing I dont get is that the kids dont even care about alot of this but the adults around keep insisting they do. 

susanm's picture

"Sure, no problem.  Hold on a minute while I take my handful of Percocet.  Ready to go, SD?  You can take the wheel if I start to get a little light-headed."  What morons.  I love how "sometimes you have to help family" applies only to them and not to the person recovering from major surgery!

Ursula's picture

Is your husband there to take care of SD?  If he is, I think that's fine.  However, if he is going to work and expecting you to take care of your new baby and SD he is of course way out of line?

beebeel's picture

My husband took two weeks off after our son was born and the first week we did not have the skids. I was learning to breastfeed and was wearing a freaking diaper myself. Overnight visitors were not an option.

Ursula's picture

obviously people have different feelings about that.  I had a c section and my husband didn't switch up from the regular 50/50 custody schedule after my DD was born.  But he was there to take care of her and I was fine with that.

Jcksjj's picture

I'd be fine with it if either A. She was a decent kind kid like I think most big sisters are or B. DH would quit pretending shes acting fine when shes not and actually watch her.

Ursula's picture

I understand that.  My SD was very excited about her new sister.  If I was in your situation, I would feel the same way you do.

Br1ghterS1de's picture

I read the BabyGate blog (and in my mind, it's now known as BabyGate like WaterGate) not realizing that this was the same child being dropped off in this blog post (well, until you said it). I wouldn't want her around my newborn anyway even if I'd hiccuped the baby out, was posing in front of the British press two hours later and having tea with the queen that night. Fu** that noise. BM can smirk all she wants, take that kid home.