Update on "speaking of BMs who think the they own the kids"
DH had dinner with SS19 tonight. He wants to take the year off from college next year. He says he doesn't like school (what a surprise), and he's been fighting with BM. DH asked about the green card (without telling him BM had emailed him) and he said he "had always been interested in getting one". Uh-huh. DH told him he'd need to come up with the money (about $2000) and that perhaps he should ask BM, since DH was paying her a lot of money in child support every month.
SS also brought up one of the big issues that had always bothered him in regard to DH (and I assume helped lead to the alienation) - that DH supposedly "made" BM sell a sports car she had when they met.
That's it, folks - he didn't speak to his dad for 3 years because he supposedly made BM sell a sports car that she owned.
But - at least he's talking about it now. DH let him know that they agreed she'd sell the car because it was a two-seater and there were the three of them plus BM's older kids.
Anyway - all encouraging news. DH doesn't have to pay tuition next year, SS is coming out of his alienation, and maybe with a green card he will move to be with his girlfriend, and child support can be stopped too.
And BM will be ignored.