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Noncustodial BM trying out PAS

ksmom14's picture

SS17 bought a car from BM's brother a while back. It was a complete piece of crap, DH did not get to see it before it was purchased, and tried to trust BM when she explained that it was fine for the price ($600). Well it lasted about 6 months before the tires were bald and it was unsafe for SS17 to drive it anymore. SS17 had been saving up to buy a new vehicle and had a few thousand dollars, but not the full $5,000 he wanted before purchasing. I was planning on buying a new vehicle in July, and was going to save my car for SD13, and SD15 to use. Long story short, we offered for SS17 to buy my car now for $6,000 and he could pay off the rest with an interest free payment plan to us. He took it, and all has been good, he got a safe vehicle that is free of issues and we know has been well taken care of. 

I looked at the Kelley Blue Book value for my car before giving him that price. The TRADE IN value for my vehicle was $4,400 - $5,600 while the private party sale value was $6,400 - $8,000. Selling SS17 the car at $6,000 I ended up getting a better deal than if I had traded it (which I wasn't going to remember, I was going to keep it for SDs), but it ended up giving SS17 a great deal had he bought the same vehichle from somewhere else. It seemed like a win win.

So SS17 last night came home from work and started talking to DH and I about BM saying things about my car. I'm surprised he even told us this honestly because I'm sure he knew we'd be mad. But basically BM looked up the KBB value (how she knows what condition that car is in confuses me since she's never even touched it) and told SS17 that she thinks $6,000 is too high of a price. She told SS17 that maybe DH is trying to scam him out of money because SS17 caused some water damage in our home about a year ago. Story on that - SS17 overflowed his shower and we had to rip open the ceiling underneath his bathroom, we took off work to get out damaged ceiling area, and then paid $600 to have someone redo the drywall, then we painted it. We told SS17 that he had to pay the $600, which we made him give us the cash, and then at Christmas time we wrapped it up and gave it right back to him. 

I'm just soooo damn pissed that BM is making us look like assholes, I'm sure she's just trying to make us look bad because she can never do anything for her own damn kids. 

Anyways, just a vent....I'm not crazy tho right? SS17 still got a good deal right?!


hereiam's picture

What does SS say about all of this? Does he feel that he got a good deal?

If the private party sale value was between 6,400 and 8,000, he at least got a fair deal and peace of mind that he knows where the car has been and that it's been well maintained.

ksmom14's picture

We haven't been able to really sit down and talk to him about it much, it was pretty late when he got home and DH and I were both pretty livid. 

I know DH plans to talk to him and I want to go onto KBB and show him the actual info, because I have a feeling BM was only telling/showing him the trade in value and making it seem like we were over charging. SS17 didn't seem mad or accusatory, moreso just questioning I suppose. 

tog redux's picture

It's good that he told you - that means he's not believing BM entirely and wants DH's point of view.  Very good.

Show him KBB and teach him how it works. Then DH should tell him that if he thought SS owed money for the shower incident, he would have asked upfront, not tricked him into paying more for the car. Ask SS is he feels DH has ever tried to trick him that way in the past.

BM is mad because her effort to be the "nice parent" who gets him a car fell flat. 

thinkthrice's picture

"trusted the BM"

BIG mistake!!

Sounds like ye olde projection.  She and her bro actually gypped SS17 but they want to accuse you of the same thing.