I’m ready. I’m ready to work on disengaging.
Today I decided, I cannot allow myself to be affected by all of this drama with being in the SM role and dealing with BM and skids. I want to ENGAGE into our marriage and DISENGAGE from BM and skids.
I suggested separate finances so I can COMPLETELY disengage. In the heat of the moment, DH agreed. I don’t know if we will follow through with this decision, but in the midst of our heated discussion today- we both agreed and worked out some quirks of it. (Taking name off account, splitting bills, which bills will be paid first, etc). I feel this is the only way I can completely disengage and remove myself from the situation (as much as possible).
Who has moved to a solid level of disengagement? What helped you? What did you learn from it? What do you recommend or not recommend?
Does anyone maintain separate finances between DH and DW? How does it work for you? Did moving to separate finances affect your relationship with DH at all? Did it help you to disengage?
suggestions, opinions, thoughts, anything...please!