18 year old Alcoholic
I know teens are going to drink, I get that, I'm not stupid. But SD18 is a full blown alcoholic already. She drinks heavily daily. When she lived with us we had found empty wine bottles behind her headboard, beer bottles shoved in drawers, (meaning she was sitting in her room drinking) phone calls from police that she was busted with alcohol. We saw her recenty at a local sports bar sitting there with friends drinking margaritas. DH says "Hi, we're just grabbing a bite to eat, love you" and keeps walking. I'm sure he was walking super fast and not talking to her so I wouldn't stop and see that she was drinking a margarita. (which it was obvious)
I recently downloaded the venmo app as someone needed to send me money. If your not familiar with it you can see how your phone contacts are transferring money. For example SD sent money to friend for "beer", SD sent money to friend for "cigs". The person sending the money types in whatever they want in the "for" field. It's kind of like the memo section on a paper check.
Downloading this app brought to light how much SD is really drinking. "Wasted Wednesday" "Margarita Tuesday" "It's monday why not drink" "Cigarettes" "my alcohol problem" "puff puff" "I have no self control w/alcohol" "for not puking on me last night". These are her comments and what she is sending money to her friends for. Her friends have also sent her money for 'fake ids" Which I assume this is her new job, selling fake ids.
I'm sure you are asking yourself why does she care if DH doesn't care, BM doesn't care and her grandparents don't care? I care b/c if something happens to her it's going to destroy my family. I will essentially lose DH. I care b/c I have a young BD that I don't need seeing her 1/2 sister being an alcoholic at 18. I care b/c I have nieces that see her drunk shannigans on Instagram and Facebook. I don't want them thinking this is the norm. I care because someone is driving them home when they're all sitting there drinking? She's putting her life and everyone around her life in danger. I'm not sure how no one else around can see this problem. SD's mom is a recovering alcoholic, SD's grandma & granpda are a recovering alcoholics and SD's other grandpa is an alcoholic. Alcoholism runs in the family and at 18 she is already drinking this heavily?
Please I need advice, what would you do in this situation? No matter how much I tell DH he ignores it or says "I hope some day she finds her way" "She's 18 and doesn't live with us, what do you want me to do?" I love DH very much and leaving our family over his daughter and her issues isn't going to happen. But something needs to be done before she hurts herself, her friends or even worse an innocent bystander!