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probably tired of looking at these blogs but...

happymostly's picture

i know what it is I need to do.

I've known this whole time. I am not in love anymore with H. I know that no matter what, counseling or not, nothing will change how I feel. It's not that anything major has happened (besides a few of his angry outburts) and that we had major problems, but all of it made me realize that I dont think I was ever really 'in love' with him except maybe about a a year after we were together, and that we should not of gotten married. I knew in my head when I got married that a little part of me had known that I shouldnt of done it. I wasnt really all that excited when he proposed to me. I knew it was coming, but I was not overjoyed.

Even though I dont feel like I've tried 100% to 'make it work', how can I when I dont feel like I ever really truly loved him? The last angry outburst he had made me realize that I dont want it to work. I know he would be happier with someone who can make him truly happy. and even if it did 'work' my feelings would still be the same about him....

Not sure how to tell him either. He knows that I was thinking about divorce, but thus far he thinks Im still confused and that we will work it out.


VioletsareBlue's picture

I'm so sorry to hear it. No matter the circustances, it's a tough thing. Hang in there!