Help!

evilstepdaughter's picture

hi, im new to this site but i hope i will find someone that understands!
I have a 2 year old son and a 6 year old step daughter, the SD is always lying and trying to turn her mum against me, she is so sneaky and everyone says 'oh she's only 6 she doesn't understand' but she knows full well what she's doing.
Yesterday, her mum was in the kitchen, and the SD swore so i sent her to the naughty step, her mum asked her what she had said an the SD promised her that she didnt swear, resulting in me being accused of lying about her! needless to say there was a big argument and now it looks like we are splitting up. How can i make my partner see what her evil daughter is like?? help!

Comments

evilstepdaughter's picture

yes, im the step dad, she doesnt see her dad because he left on her own once, we also have a son together

Kb3Hooah's picture

IMO, the problem isn't SD - the problem is your wife. Regardless of whether the behavior is appropriate or not, kids lie so they don't get in trouble. And because SD see's this working first hand, she's going to continue. Any child will do this, heck, even ADULTS do this.

Your wife needs to TRUST you, and she needs to hold SD accountable for her behavior. Until she does this, SD's behavior is not going to change.

How long has this been an issue for you guys?
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"Most couples have not had hundreds of arguments, they've had the same argument hundreds of times."

Amazed's picture

You can't get your wife to see her daughter as evil so it's useless to even try. She will always see you as the evil one as long as you're trying to pin things onto her daughter...regardless of her daughter's obvious guilt, you'll always come out looking like the bad guy.

With that said, I think you need to focus on helping your wife understand that you are NOT the bad guy. I think you need to work on helping her understand you are not her enemy and you are not her daughter's enemy...it is not them against you...you're all in it together. She needs to understand that and stop being so blind about things. But, just a bit of wisdom from someone who has a spouse similar to your wife...don't try to make her understand by cutting down her daughter or trying to reveal her daughter's "evilness". it won't work and she'll end up leaving you and insisting you hate her kid for no reason. You've got to get to her in another way.

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We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are. ~Anaïs Nin