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Recent Blog Posts
My future DH is a wonderful man. That is why, despite warnings from my single friends, I made the leap and pursued a relationship with someone with two children and a, shall we say-emotionally and cognitively challenged, ex-wife (the BM). I call her C U Next Tuesday (you figure it out ). All was well and good as I slowly developed a relationship with the soon to be SD(7) and SS(9).
SS has ADHD. My SS, H and the BM have been attending counseling for SS. The past 2 weeks H and BM have had session with counselor seperate from SS session.
During those 2 sessions BM has stated that H is to hard on SS and that he has no patience with him. Her reasons for us being to hard were due to his chore list which consists of: make bed, hang up clothes, take out trash, set table, clean off table, sweep floor after eating. Then H has no patience because of his ADHD.
Ok, first of all I have to say that I can never sleep! I hate it and I'm always tired!
... you have something to say. I have been waiting for you to chime in.
I find it interesting & very admirable that so many blended families went into their marriages ready to treat SKs as a package deal with DH. I feel like maybe I didn't get the mother gene. Don't get me wrong, I slid into the role as mom for BS1 very easily & gladly. I've loved every minute of parenting him & can proudly & confidently say that I am a good mom. Why is it so much harder to do this for SKs? It started when I first moved in with DH. It seemed like BM had tried to make friends with me, but I haven't seen her keep any friends.
So, I have been dating my fiance for over a year now, and have gotten along great with SD(7). The situation with her is that BM has primary custody, but allows open visitation. However, because my fiance has gone back to school and is working full time, he can only see SD on Saturday nights and Sundays. When we have her, we do everything we can to make her happy. Sometimes, I even go and pick her up myself if fiance is still working late. We go out to eat, go to movies, go bowling, us girls get pedicures; we bond alot, and get along great!!
Someone posted about muttering to themselves "Not my problem. Not my problem." or something to that effect and it made me think of something I find myself saying fairly often.
The three most freeing words I ever say to the skids: "Go ask daddy."
I use it over and over again to great effect. If I'm sick of whining and feeding them and everything else, it's so simple - I pawn it all off on the real parent for a while.
....Borderline Personality Disorder, the more I think we both are afflicted with it. Could this be that same feeling I get whenever I look up a bump online or in a medical journal and come to the conclusion I have Cancer or AIDS?? (that always happens, haha)
Enter symptoms,(types: bump on right arm) = Many bumps on right arms are found to be, (enter large latin word), and the precursor to AIDS.
OK, Please tell me you get my drift and that I am not the only one that is diagnosed with terrible diseases when I search my symptoms.
Kevin The Man
I posted a comment to your blog, but the comment section was getting SO long, I thought I would just post a new blog with my thoughts for you. We can be an intense bunch, so I hope you can hang-in there until you find what you need.
Here is what I had to say in my comment to you:
what i mean when you marrie into a family do you take on the role of a mom or dad as well
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