So in a Canadian Step Parent group I'm in on Facebook this was asked - "If you could give one piece of advice to a stepmom what would it be?" 

Someone commented "Prioritize your health and your marriage. If the kids behave in a rude and disrespectful way and you could not do anything about it, take a step back and disengage. Never force yourself upon them and do not beat yourself about it. Let their dad and mom handle the discipline, unless otherwise necessary. Focus your time and energy on people that want it from you."

And got this response lol