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MIL/BM...Somehow forgot to mention this in my last blog.

unbelieveable's picture

I just wrote a blog but I forgot to add last weekends battle with mother in law.

Boyfriend and I plan ALOT of benefits for friends with cancer. Last weekend we planned a benefit for a little 4 year old girl with a wilms tumor. During our event for her we get a phonecall (this event is at a private club where there was a DJ and BM knew where we were...) it's SD9 telling us she has a cheerleading competition the next morning...but she has NO idea what time it starts? So he says - okay - call me as soon as you know - make sure you call me right back! We didn't know where it was...what time...anything. Well - she never calls back - we figured maybe she got her weekend screwed up or something...(which happens alot) - after the benefit we stayed out until 3 a.m. - we had a GREAT time. We took advantage of it because we NEVER go out! We danced- we actually saw friends and after we counted the money we raised over $5000 for this little girl. We go home...we go to bed.

The next morning...his cellphone rings at 9 am - it's sd9 - she is at her competition? But has no idea what time she goes on. We are in bed. I knew we'd have to get up...get showered...etc. We'd never make it! Next thing we know...his mother is banging on our bedroom door - she wanted to borrow the keys to the car. He gets up and gives them to her and we have no idea for what...she doesn't get out of bed until 1pm everyday...his dad returns with the car and no mother in law? So we get up and we are rushing to get ready - we still don't hear anything and BM won't answer her phone...so we wait it out...around noon (the time we pick up the girls every weekend) he calls BM again - she answers and says she is coming over to drop off HIS mother and one of the girls? He's like uh? WHAT? Of course...I'm heated. WTF is going on? She says, "Well your mom and sd7 didn't want to go to lunch with us so I am dropping them off and then you can come get sd9 when we are done..." He says this is RIDICULOUS and hangs up. His mom walks in all chipper...BM this and BM that...WOW you guys should have been there! and is yapping about BM's new boyfriend...(HELLO! WHO CARES ABOUT HER NEW BOYFRIEND? WHERE IS BABY DADDY? THE BABY IS ONLY A YEAR OLD! THIS IS THE SECOND TIME SHE HAS LEFT BABY DADDY FOR ANOTHER DUDE! WHERE ARE THIS CHICK'S MORALS?) So...he goes to pick up SD9...brings her into the house and she starts acting like we didn't want to be there and is giving us attitude - he says FOR NOW ON YOUR MOTHER NEEDS TO TELL ME WHEN THINGS ARE! She gets mad at him. We made sure every time she brought it up - we reminded her we didn't know any details or anything about it. We also made sure we reminded his mother that she is the grandmother...he and BM are divorced...and being that HE is the father - he will know before she knows for now on. We are sick of them teaming up to make him look like he is the bad guy - they plot behind his back and his own mother and her keep secrets. This happens all the time. I told his aunt about this and she was appalled and said this is what they do - they have always done this and there is no reason for her to still be in contact with the girls mother - it is disrespectful to me and there is no reason why their own father never knows anything and MIL does...he talks to the girls EVERY night. Complete BS. Even better...boyfriend got a text a few days after that she and her team got first in the competition...right after he gets it - MIL walks and blurts it out like we don't know...apparently BM is also texting this woman. I know we can't put a stop to it - If we ever get out of here - I plan on just never coming to see her ever so I won't have to worry about their wonderful friendship they have. I guess they both forget...I have something they don't...HIM.

Comments

Most Evil's picture

Wow, MIL would be on my shit list for sure. Your BF needs to get the schedule himself and not rely on anyone else to keep him informed.

I would seriously tell MIL off. Why are you living in her house? Time to leave!!!

unbelieveable's picture

Yeah...she's crazy. WHY are we living here? I am a student who works three jobs to pay my bills - and my student loans off. I do everything myself - and to do that I can't afford rent anywhere yet...my boyfriend pays such a crazy amount of CS and he works for the county...and puts all of his extra money into sh*t for his parents. Not to mention the price of damn groceries and everything else. It's like there is no way out. We don't live here because we want to...obviously.

unbelieveable's picture

In my blogs from the past I have mentioned MIL's ridiculous behavior. We don't have an issue with the children keeping in contact with grandparents. However, we live here too. They see them when we see them. It IS the parent's right to know first and forehand. He is by no means a dead beat dad. He didn't "get on to the kid" - he told her she needs to tell him. The kid is smarter than most...she knows when things are. I guess you don't have an insane MIL? That has 3 sons...that have all been divorced...with 2 children to the previous marriage? and practically remarried...I mean MOST don't have this situation. it's like a trap. she only keeps in contact with THIS BM. She does not bother with the other two at all...she calls this BM to ask how her day was...nothing about the kids...to ask what her plans are...etc. We are thinking about a court order that requires BM to tell him FIRST and give him schedules. He is not an unreliable father. He speaks to them almost every night unless she doesn't answer. Which seems to always happen the week before some event the kids have...yet - she answers MIL's calls...and then MIL refuses to tell her own son what they were talking about...This doesn't sound weird to you?