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Poll Time- How many SM talk to their step kids mother aka the ex

tryingtomakeit's picture

Had a girl's night last night at my friends house and the subject came up. I have friends that are divorced or married to a divorced man. SO the question is......

How many step moms deal more with the ex that has to do with kid issues?

I have a friend who talks to the ex all the time about the kids.

Then I have another who doensnt have a thing to do with the ex. When the ex calls the kids father is is mostly when the she is not around.

Just wondering....

Comments

dakotamom's picture

i want nothing to do with her. DH wants nothing to do with her. any information is passed from parent to kid to parent. there is little direct contact.

MARLA_823's picture

Up until BM and I had a fight recently, I used to do all the communicating. It worked out well for everyone, actually. She preferred talking to me, DH preferred her talking to me, and I liked it because I didn't have anything sprung on me last minute because he forgot to tell me.

Chavez's picture

I-m so happy My situation exactly, except our blow up was a while back now. Before that, we actually got along very well.

poisonivy's picture

Very rarely do either of us speak to her. We communicate through mail, texts and email when necessary (other than urgent matters).

caregiver1127's picture

A few times BM called me because she thought she could ride right over me - I showed her that I don't take shit from anyone and now she just calls DH - I never wanted her to call me she just would - I don't like her - I would never be friend with someone like her so I feel why do I have to deal with her she is DH's problem not mine - we have 2 more years and then we are done - we live 700 miles apart I see her once a year and now I am going to make DH go by himself the next time he visits so next I see her will be at SS's graduation unless my half ironman triathlon falls on that weekend then I will never have to see her again (as I have a feeling SS will not be getting married unless it becomes legal!)

True mom's picture

I do not talk to BM. She is one of those people that you give an inch she takes a mile! And the last thing I need or want is that woman to think I want to be involved with her in any way. Can't stand her, she is an idiot!

skylarksms's picture

Very little communication with BM here either. I never have had to talk to her much at all and when I tried to, she would just scream at me.

DH cut off communication completely with BM (not that he ever LIKED talking to her!) after she called him up screaming at him because SD was pregnant. Like it was HIS fault that she wasn't supervised at BM's house!

True mom's picture

I have spoken to my XHs GFs and had no issue's also. But BM forget it!
At birthday parties I'm as cordial as possible, while BM sits talking to other's about how it's hard not having her family. Boohoo. You cheated, you f'd up, you divorced him, suck it up and get over it! Mind you she is also engaged and still acts this way!

SKIDs are better off with us!

ThatGirl's picture

BM and I do not speak. In fact, I'm pretty sure she'd burst into flame if we had to be in the same room together. Pretty much the same thing with my SO... she will not communicate unless it's absolutely necessary, and even then she uses the kids as her mouthpiece.

Miss_Understood's picture

Not going 2 ever be that woman's friend. Despise the hag. I want nothing to do with her and SO wants nothing to do with her, hoping mediation fixes that. In my experience the EXBM BRINGS NOTHING BUT PROBLEMS!

Jada's picture

I resent my husbands ex and have no respect for her. She has a 9 year old daughter that lives with us during the week. I pick SD9 up from school every day because she can't be bothered. My DH has had his daughter since she was 2 years old. the ex doesn't pay for anything, no financial contribution at all. So now it's my responsibility and I resent it. So no, I have no words for her.

young_step_mom's picture

I would like to at least be on speaking terms with BM for the sake of SS, but BM hates HATES hates me. SS is often stuck in the middle and I know he often times feels guilty being nice to me because BM is always talking trash about me. I wish I knew how to make her understand that we should all try to be amicable for the sake of SS but I have NO idea how to go about it.