I posted years ago as "tog" but deleted my account after my SS PAS'd out around 3 years ago at 15.
Well, he's back. I don't have the energy to post much back story but suffice it to say that BM is a selfish, entitled narcissist and we dealt with all the usual crazy BM antics until SS finally PAS'd out for good. It was hard for DH at first, but eventually we settled into the peace and quiet and got on with our lives. He kept the lines of communication open with SS as much as he could, but we had already spent ungodly amounts of money on court, and even his own attorney advised he drop it and give it some time. I was at the end of my rope and ready to leave, so he stopped the court battle.
Recently BM went after more Child Support (age 21 state) and after she found out it's possible to end child support completely due to alienation while in court, doesn't SS18 turn up again! He's every bit as enmeshed with BM as he ever was, and well on his way to Failure to Launch. He barely graduated high school. He's in community college now but we don't see that working out.
He and I always got along well, on the surface, he's a polite and pleasant person - who lies, manipulates and has zero sense of himself other than how BM defines him. DH is glad to have a relationship again with SS, but he is not a Disney Dad and does not have rose-colored glasses on. He has always put me first and sees his son for exactly who he is. He's never been one to give SS what he wants to keep him around and he's never let him disrespect me.
The first CS case was dismissed but BM just summoned DH again for a second effort. So we are back on the crazy train again.