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I can't let this go

Tiger7's picture

SD21 has covid. The one who refused to get vaxxed cause she didn't want to be told what to do. DH was at her house the day before we found out. As a result, per health dept, we had to quarantine which meant I had to cancel Thanksgiving dinner with my kids. My oldest lives in another state and traveled 10 hrs to be here. I had also spent a ton of money on food. DH and I feel fine...we're getting tested on Sun.  SD21 and her live in BF both are positive but feel ok. Her kids, 1 and almost 3, tested negative so far. I'm pissed at myself for letting my guard down! SD told DH that she plans to get the vaccine once she's able and he is ecstatic cause he thinks they can now be with us for Christmas.  I don't see how she can be fully vaxxed by then and I told him she needs to be before I let her in my house. I'm just pissed at all this and can't get past it. In another week, the kids will go back to daycare and DH picks them up twice a week. One of those days they stay at our house for abt 5 hrs till SD picks them up. I don't want them here right now. This is all going to cause issues between DH and I.  We don't have many issues except for SD21. Her piss poor choices which end up affecting our lives is the only source of contention between us. I'm having a hard time letting this one go. 

Comments

Winterglow's picture

I think he's getting excited for nothing. There's a time lapse to respect aftter having COVID and getting her shot (can't remember how long it is). Then you have to count on two weeks after getting the shot for it to be effective. There's no way she'll be at your place for Xmas.  

hereiam's picture

Plus, if she gets a 2 shot vaccine, there's a waiting period between those 2 shots. No way she will be fully vaccinated by Christmas.

notsurehowtodeal's picture

I got COVID before vaccines were available and before the Delta variant. My Doctor told me I needed both doses and the booster. I have never heard of people being told they only needed one dose if they already had COVID.

tog redux's picture

The US did have quicker access to a more plentiful vaccine supply - that might have driven the policy.

Winterglow's picture

I think it has more to do with natural immunity being acquired via infection (think of childhood viruses - measles, chicken pox, etc.) with the actual virus thus making the first shot pointless. 

tog redux's picture

Except everything I read says they don't know how long natural immunity lasts even now, and they certainly didn't back then.  I don't think Europe would be following different scientific advice.

ETA: Looks like it's a mix of both. There is some evidence that people who have had COVID may be okay with one dose, and it allows countries with limited supplies to stretch them more:

https://www.nature.com/articles/d41586-021-01609-4

CajunMom's picture

This is CoVid. It kills people. I'm not sure how her kids can even go back to daycare since they are constantly exposed to her and her BF. They'd all have to quarantine and until everyone is negative in the home (at least here). And I would not allow ANY of them in my home while people are still positive within their main home. Get through your quarantine (due to DH being exposed by SD) and then keep your place "off limits" to anyone with that kind of exposure.

I know people that have died from CoVid and many who are struggling with the serious after affects of CoVid. We don't mess around here. If I were in your position, this would be exactly what I'd do and I would not give a good shitz about what anyone thought. My home, my life.

And don't worry about Christmas. First injection. Then a two week waiting period. Second injection. Another two week waiting period before fully vaccinated.

CLove's picture

But approach it clinicaly without the emotion. Id be pissed too! Shes got two children and she should be way more responsible, but she sounds selfish and self serving.

I dont see that Christmas will be doable, DH. And here is why...

tog redux's picture

I am very, very pro-vax and very angry at those (many in my family) who won't get vaxxed - BUT, the science seems to indicate that she may have some natural immunity for 3-6 months, and the data is inconclusive about how much risk there is of getting COVID twice and how quickly it can happen.  To get into Canada from the US, you can show a positive test within the last 2 weeks to 6 months in lieu of a negative test within 72 hours. So he probably is safe to be around them for Christmas.

That being said, I still won't be around my anti-vax sister who had COVID a couple of months ago. My DH is immuno-compromised and since she thinks COVID is "no big deal" and the vaccine is terribly dangerous, I don't trust her to make good decisions.

Winterglow's picture

Much the same here in France (and probably in most of the EU), a positive test result within the last 11 days to 6 months.

bananaseedo's picture

I have to agree, I would be angry too for how careless she was, but chances are she will have pretty good immunity for a few months at the least.  

Harry's picture

She can not come for Christmas. No if,an or buts   She distroyed one holiday No need of her destroying a second . 
She did not care who she gave covid too. why care about her.

missgingersnap2021's picture

I'm confused. If you your husband and your children are vaccinated why do you care who gets Covid? I don't walk around worrying now about who's getting Covid because I am vaccinated. Also there's places that do rapid testing. the second you found out you were around somebody with Covid you could've gotten a rapid test and found out before Thanksgiving.

hereiam's picture

Because a vaccinated person can still get Covid and still pass it on to others. They may not get as sick and may not be contagious for as long as the non-vaccinated but there are still risks.

Even with being vaccinated, one should take some precautions.

notsurehowtodeal's picture

The reason I care about who gets COVID is because the more it spreads, the greater chance there is for variants to develop that might be worse than "original" COVID, and the vaccines may not be as effective against the variants.

Tiger7's picture

We did the rapid test but one of the people coming to my house was still nervous.  3 out of 5 of them work with young children.  We talked back and forth and then I just took the decision out of their hands and canceled so no one would feel pressured to come. i don't know if it was necessary but it was a quick decision and I felt like it was the responsible thing to do.

Nette5's picture

Once spring 2020 when the babysitter got covid & mom couldn't take the time off so she went over every day they were in quarantine. SGD5 tested positive then & a couple months ago SGD5 got really sick but they didn't test her for covid, but mom got sick with the same symptoms & she tested positive. 

SGD5's mom doesn't wear a mask or make her wear one. The only reason mom's getting the vaccine is to keep her job here in the US cuz she works for a hospital. 

My SD23 tested positive for covid a couple weeks before SGD5's mom because her coworker thought he had a head cold & came to work... he got her sick then died from covid... she's lucky she didn't get very sick. 

The 3 in my house have all been vaccinated & we still tend to wear masks in public because we know you can still get covid after being vaccinated, after having covid, & after both being vaccinated and having covid. 

tog redux's picture

Yes. Two of my staff have had covid and were quite sick for a week, even young, healthy and vaccinated. Vaccinated elderly and immunocompromised people can still die from COVID, so I don't want to spread it to others who might get sicker than I would. People do need to care even if they are vaccinated. 

Aniki-Moderator's picture

The son of a coworker is fully vaxxed and has covid for the third time. He's in the hospital, on a ventilator. *sad*

tog redux's picture

Is he immuno-compromised, I assume? Or just really unlucky?

That's very sad, either way.  Even though my DH is pretty healthy for an immunocompromised person, and he rarely gets sick, I'm not taking any chances. 

Aniki-Moderator's picture

No. Aside from the very occasional cold, he has always be incredibly healthy.