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How to deal with DH babying skids

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If anything I have not babied my bios enough probably. DH thinks the skids are too young to do anything and FEARS I mean FEARS anything happening to them.

Now I am not saying skids should be put in danger or do anything to drawn unwanted attention to themselves. I come from a family of law enforcement and know the dangers.

How are we celebrating the skids return?

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Why with new a new door lock for our bedroom, turning the garage into a locked fortress, new mattresses and bedding as the old were so nasty when we tossed them even the garbage guys said they were nasty. By buying brand spanking new personal hygiene items that DH promises he will monitor for usage(suuuuuuure) and of course a brand new extra large Rx of anti-anxiety meds!

Facebook crap

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There have been a recent influx of news reports in my newsfeed about children who have been killed or seriously injured by their mother's boyfriends or husband and sometimes the mother is involved.

I have watched and read the hundreds of comments on these stories and somehow the 'real mother' still wins over the stepmom. Even when BM is in charge and the child ends up dead she is the 'real mother' and should have acted like it but thank heavens the kid wasn't with dad and dad's woman because she isn't 'the real mother'

WTH?

And they are coming back...

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Skids have been with BM for almost 4 weeks. She has called, texted and emailed at all hours continually threatening to keep them solely due to the fact that I am NOT THE REAL MOM.

First I was supportive of DH and told him no way was she going to keep them and even if she tried to she has dug herself a legal hole, in which legally kidnapping them would not help.

Then I tried humor. Well her BF is not THE REAL DAD. They are boys and the BF doesn't do all the things that DH does in terms of boy stuff. Scouts, fishing, camping, sports, etc.

So you KNOW you are rewarding bad behavior?!

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Back story: DH and decided 12 was the age of getting your own cell phone.
SS10 has now destroyed 3 tablets(all DH's) and 2 phones(1 DH's and 1 belonging to SS18)

SS12 dropped a brand new $700 phone into the pool after being told NOT to take it. SS12 also not only used the entire family's data in 1 day he almost tripled it until DH caught him.

Due to move we have to change cell phone provider. Which means all new phones and paying off that useless $700 pool phone.

DH: I think when we switch we should add SS12 to phone plan

$*#%&^!!!!! This is on you DH!

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I am so annoyed with DH. We are moving and I had to go in and clean the skids' bathroom.

I have no nice words for it. Rotting food under the sink, molding towels and washcloths, every bottle of handsoap ever given is full and shoved into a drawer along with toothbrushes full of God knows what. All the TP was covered in dust and squashed but never even unrolled. But the walls are covered in poop and snot and something else I cannot identify.

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