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You know what BM? STFU just STFU

TheWicked's picture

Backstory: BM lives 3 very large states away and sees the skids only when DH pays for their travel. She has never paid CS nor changed her plans to see them or call them. Every time she does see them she tries to get money out of DH for the visit or suddenly has a life threatening emergency which means she cannot see them.

BM whines that she wants to see skids this summer since she never sees them. DH says sure you can have them for 6 weeks. BM says Oh yes! Wonderful! Next day she is upset and says she has to work for the summer so she can only see them maybe 3 or 4 days. Eye rolls on our end.

Then BM must have surgery right away to fix something wrong in her stomach. She is sure it is cancer(in the last 3 years she has 'had' breast cancer, lung cancer, bowel cancer, and bone cancer she is a miracle and overcomes each problem in a few weeks) and so no skids at all unless she gets to the point she will not recover in which case it is DH's LEGAL DUTY to take skids to see her before she dies.

Suddenly, BM loses her job and so no health insurance means no surgery. But in a miraculous turn around her stomach no longer hurts! She is fine! But she cannot have skids as she has no money.

Then BM calls weeping. She must see her children they are all she has. OK when? DH will buy tickets and send them. She gives date says they will stay for maybe a week. Then a few days later she asks if they can stay 2 weeks. No one here cares how long JUST GIVE THE DAMN DATES so plane tickets can be bought.

Tickets are bought(the kind you can end up saving for other dates). BM calls weeping again. She needs to have her children and why are we always keeping her precious babies from her. DH says you can have them for 5 weeks!(one week is now gone) As long as you want! BM gets pissed and starts screaming about how she doesn't have any money and can't feed them and can't take care of the oldest who lives with her and they will soon be homeless. Uh, yeah. Cause the man you live with-a lawyer-is suddenly putting you out? He has drug your ass around for over 5 years now and seems to enjoy your drama. He also has always bought all the food and seems to enjoy the skids as he has no sons.

DH points out he always sends money for the visits and all be fine. BM then PLEADS for more time with kids! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I just want to scream at BM that SHE is the one who whittles down their visit time. Then she bitches to skids that DH refuses to let them come for as long as she wants them.

I am SO sick of this shit. Summer, fall break, Christmas break, spring break. The same freaking thing EVERY time!

Comments

Ninji's picture

I'm sure he's paying for travel and food because "it's what's best for the kids"

misSTEP's picture

She needs to be put on ignore. Tell her all communication will only be through email now. At least document her idiocy!

Is she on drugs?

robin333's picture

You can't get frustrated with BM'S whims- the world revolves around her and you should be content being so close to her. I'm being sarcastic here.

Seriously, I'm wondering with Misstep-is she on drugs? I would have to ignore her. I like what everyone else says about email only when she has bought the tickets.

TheWicked's picture

DH does not respond to the crazy. He only sent an email asking for the dates she wanted the kids. She will not pick them up from the airport if she doesn't agree to the dates.(Yes, she has not picked them up before).

The other crazy, job, health, etc are sent on pretty much a daily basis. He doesn't respond so she often sends crazy to the school, our pastor, old friends of theirs. It never stops. I have other posts about how she sends emails with *******WRITTEN LEGAL NOTICE************ and then makes all kinds of threats.

He pays for their travel because in the beginning he felt it was 'the right thing to do' now he does it so we have a break from the skids. The money he sends on visits is for sure guilt money but he gives it to the skids and tells them it is so they can do fun stuff with the mother. That way she can't bitch about how it is his fault and woe is she for being poor. She tried that once and the youngest said 'but dad sent all that money. He even counted it out'.

hereiam's picture

How old are these kids? I would be leery of even sending the kids to be in her care. Not picking them up from the airport? She can't feed them?

TheWicked's picture

The drama comes regardless of visits. She texts, emails, and leaves VM almost everyday. For a long time there was the 'if you don't call me and let me know someone in this world cares I will kill myself'. That was when I had a lawyer send a letter letting her know the cops and CPS would be called every time she did that.

Skids are 10,12, and 16. The 19 year old lives with her FT. Yes, she left the skids at the airport when they were 4,6,10. I was not around then but DH felt they were too young to fly alone so he was with them. He did not tell BM he would be there as he felt she would pull some such crap. She said that he had 'forced' the visit on her and surprise! she was under going cancer treatment and had no food.

The kids always eat out with her. Five Guys, Culivers, etc not cheap eats for 4 kids IMO. They always come back chunky so the food thing is her whining. Plus, her BF really seems to enjoy the boys as he has only girls he doesn't see much. The skids usually come back with new clothes and pictures of going to amusement parks, rodeos, the beach, and museums. So yeah, she is BROKE.

misSTEP's picture

I'd be a little ticked off at him falling for her manipulation as obviously she only does it to try to get extra money from him. His kids are not going hungry at all if he doesn't cough up the money.

DaizyDuke's picture

Oh my freaking land! Your DH has the patience of Job. My DH would have flipped shit on her a long time ago and told her to pound salt. This woman is a loony bird!

TheWicked's picture

I do get ticked off at him MisStep. I know she is just crazy and all but some days I just want to scream "she's pushing your buttons and you're letting her!" I mean he put up with her shit for 16 years! Walk away already! And he always worries about what she says about him to other people. I think everyone knows she is crazy! Who cares? And the kids are not going to go hungry. The 16YO would call or text if that was really happening.

WTF...REALLY's picture

Why does she have DH's phone number? She should email only. No texts, no calls.

I do get wanting a break from the skids, but sometimes it's just not worth it. I am in the same boat.

Hubby stop sending his kid to BM. She has way to many issues. Not worth it.