Thetis's Blog
Spin off from my Holidays Blog
So we're all pretty much agreeing that unless the kids ask for it that none of us would take our bio children over to Bm's place to visit with their step/half siblings.
So a couple more questions:
1. Has your Dh ever mentioned having the "family" together for the holidays?
2. How do you deal with holidays when you DONT have your skids?
3. If your Dh was set on the idea of having all of his kids together, even if it means at Bm's house, what points would you use to try to convince him otherwise?
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Holidays... ick
Just as a kinda tally,
1. Do you get along with BM?
2. Do you buy her a gift from the skids for holidays?
3. Would you expect your bio children to visit with their step/half siblings at Bms house for a holiday?
1. Kinda, and its getting better.
2. For some of the holidays we will get her something small and she will do the same for us.
3. Never, but Dh does not agree.
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Stepping on my toes to get to Sd.
My Dh, whether he admits it or not, has some guilt issues when it comes to his daughter. He is no where near as bad as some, but I still get hurt or annoyed by his actions. Here are a few examples:
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Bio-protectiveness and teaming up?
Me and FDh had a great 2 1/2 hour chat about boundaries last night. I think that switch that turned off when he went drinking with Bm must have been switched back on yesterday because his brain was back to being connected properly to his mouth.
One issue that I noticed that has kind of put me on guard is the fact that as soon as I mentioned that our kids with not be put in undesirable situations to make things easier for his relationship with bm, and/or visitation he started to get really defensive.
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Daily swimming lessons.
Ok guys, sick of me yet? Here is another issue I would like your opinions on.
Bm has enrolled munchkin into daily swimming lessons. They are about 45 min a day and I believe they happen at our supper time. 530pm. Bm has invited Dh to come and watch munchkin.
I don't really think that he should.
Here's why:
1. He will get to "see" munchkin but not interact with her. She will be in her lessons, so if he is getting attention from her then she is not paying attention to her lesson.
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Update
So after seeing SILs post on FB I started to feel bad for Dh. She is the last of his family in the area talking to us and its obvious she's crazy.
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Kinda OT, Easter Holiday?
Who here celebrates Easter weekend? Have you always? Or is it something just for the kids?
I have always celebrated Easter. My parents (well my mom) made it a big deal for us when we were growing up. I have some great memories of me and my brother trying to find Easter Eggs all over the house. I think its magical the way she did it, and I love those memories. Now since we're older we all just get together for turkey at moms house. I love having regular Holidays to catch up with my brother and get to know his girlfriend.
Dh has never celebrated Easter except for last year.
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Dh will be home soon.
God it would be great if he came in with a bunch of roses and said he was so sorry for putting me and baby through all this shit. And that we can try to talk about the boundaries and definately check out that family councilling thing.
But in real life he'll come home. Run to the bathroom for and hour or so. Make a mess in the kitchen while he fixes his supper. Read my note, and push it aside. Then sit and watch tv till he falls asleep.
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Crazy SIL on top of everything
Facebook status:
*SIL* R U F'ing kidding me!!! F OFF!!! I can't believe some people, thought they were raised better...I spose NOT!
Yesterday at 4:19pm · Comment ·LikeUnlike
*SIL Friend* Uh oh! Doesn't sound good! Hope everything is ok.
Yesterday at 4:47pm.
*SIL Other Friend* kill 'em with kindness! its what I'm doing!
Yesterday at 5:22pm.
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Over reacting? Being too hard on him? Opinions?
Ok so my parents have been through one hell of a marriage. They have worked through just about any dumb thing two people could do to each other. So my mom thinks I'm over reacting to this last lack of thought from Dh. She thinks I'm expecting too much from him. I don't know what to think. I literally thought I was crazy a month a go, I went to a councillor. She ran me through a bunch of tests ect and talked to me for two sessions. She has since told me there is not much she can do for me because all my issues are rational and normal for someone in my situation.
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