Add me to the group of "My marriage is Over"
Actually - as my "H" pointed out last night, its been over for longer than we were happily married.
so, now to make the decesion, live the way we have been living, married but no relationship or just go ahead and break it all up - including the adoptions (hearing on 21st)
I should have listened to myself and never gotten married. All we do is talk in circles. He asked what the difference was...well, when we got together he needed ME, he didn't see me as weak - now he only sees me as this needy little turd that can't function. i have dealt with a lot and a lot has taken my focus off of things (thanks ex wife) and finally push came to shove and i went to the doc - who diagnosed adhd. well - two weeks, i feel so much better - everyone BUT husband noticed and now guess what...no money to go back for the follow up tomorrow to get the refill. i find myself trying to get everything figured out now before i am off my rocker again. i have 4 kids entering school in two weeks and broke as a joke. i am sick of this, all of this.
- TheSaneOne's blog
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Wow!!!
I never saw that one coming. You showed me that the grass is not always greener. You are one of the few on here that I wish I could be more like. I am so very sorry that things have gotten so bad. Your DH needs to really step up. What on earth are you going to do about the adoprions? Wow girl! My heart is breaking for you. If you need someone to talk to, let me know. You have been such a godsend to me and my family that I just feel terrible that yours is suffering. Hang in there and knwo that whateveer choice you make I will support you and be here if you need me.
"Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your head." ...Martin Mull
Marriage Counseling?
Maybe...that could help?
You've endured so much and I just hate to see this happen to you. Especially with your recent triumph with the adoption proceedings.
Stay strong, and know that we are all here for you.
(((((((HUGS)))))))
"For every ailment under the sun....There is a remedy, or there is none;
If there be one, try to find it; If there be none, never mind it." ~ W.W. Bartley
Wow, is it in the water?
everyone is giving up it seems. Don't blame most of you! I am sorry to hear about this Sane one, but maybe it will be for the better? What about the adoptions?
i know, rite?!
im getting scared!! getting married in october and im sure all these poor ladies felt the same way i did before the wedding...optimistic, hopeful, maybe NAIVE??? now look at whats happened.
at least y'all are doing whats best for U for a change and deciding to take back ur lives. i can imagine how tough it is and i applaud ur strength.
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
My goodness this is scaring
My goodness this is scaring the ever loving shit out of me too!!! Is this my future??
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. - George Carlin
Hold on a little longer?
To me it sounds like you are still talking to each other (or fighting, which means you at least still care?) but maybe it is just not the romantic relationship you want? Me and my DH fight (and say we will break up) all the time but it doesn't ever come to anything. It sounds horrible and it is but we do try to balance it with other, good interaction too.
Financial problems are death to deal with but not as expensive as divorce? I just hate to see you get discouraged when maybe there is something you can do before throwing in the towel altogether. I understand about not being able to get the medical care you need, we both have dental problems too that we can't fix right now and it really sucks.
I am just saying can you start a dialogue about the problems, but at the stalemate point you always reach, try making just the slightest twist of perspective, request, what one of you is willing to do, to make the other happy (I know, it is all him! in 99% of the cases)!! but still. Make a list of what you cannot deal with and what you would like to see going forward. And let him know you are serious that HE needs to make some changes, pronto.
Try it for say, 6 months? and see what happens. See Anne's description of how much her marriage improved over the course of one year! Anne, are you there, what do you think?
"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin
id say
if your not happy leave it will be worth it in the long run honey my heart goes out to you x x x
life is a box of choclates you never know what your going to get (i always pick the coffe of the box what about you )