You are here

Santa Clause Syndrome

TheRealMom's picture

So here it is. My husband and I raise my step-daughters daughters full time. And have done so for the past 7 years. Raising a child, let alone two, is very very expensive as you all know.

I just find it hilarious when the birth mom, decides she actually has time to spend with our kids. It only happens about 3 times a year, for a couple of days each visit. But each time they have a visit with her, she basically tries to buy their love.

She will rent a fancy car, go to hotels with pools, and will buy them lots of stuff (gunk). She can not afford to do this - but knocks her self out trying to impress them with money she really can not afford to spend. It's really sad that she can't just be a mom. It's like she has to prove to them that she loves them by buying their love. She has more of a friend ship type relationship with them. And for some reason she keeps buying them travel coffee mugs. She has been doing this for years. They are kids! They don't drink coffee! What an idiot!

I have for the most part tried to discourage our youngest daughter from comparing us to her. Not that I tell my daughter this, but there is no comparison. We are dedicated 110% to our kids lives; while the birth mom, barely gives 10% to them. It just kills me that our youngest daughter is impressed by the birth mom trying to buy their love.

I know and understand that she is young (9), immature and doesn't yet understand what its all about. But it just sucks to know that she doesn't get it. A weekend here and there, with someone buying you crap and trying to spoil you in that short time doesn't in any way equal to my husband and I dedicating out lives to our children financially and emotional. We are the ones that feed, cloth, love and care for them 24/7.

One day hopefully our youngest daughter will get it. Our oldest, who turns 11 today, gets it. She is wise beyond her years. Thank god their not both disillusion.

Comments

Pantera's picture

What is with the hotel with a pool thing???!!! Our BM does this too!!! My ss9 doesn't have a clue yet either. I can't wait for the day he realizes who really takes care of him.

"If I turn into another, Dig me up from under what is covering the better part of me" -Incubus