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tankh21's picture

So yesterday our AC broke and there is no food in our house because I refuse to buy groceries for the skids. Am I wrong to feel that the skids just go back to BM's because my DH simply cannot afford to feed them and now our AC is broke? If I tell him that I feel the skids should go back BM's it will be World War 3. I mean the truth is I cannot tolerate them for long periods of time but, I feel that it's not fair to them to make them stay here and not be able to enjoy their summer. They don't need to suffer any more than we do. I just am not making it my problem anymore because I already have way too much going on to worry about anything more. I guess when MIL comes she will come to my DH's rescue. LOL

Comments

hereiam's picture

Don't worry about whether they are enjoying their summer or not, who cares? If your H cannot afford to feed them, HE should send them back to BM's (or figure out how to feed them).

Do you know what is wrong with the AC? There is a lot of info on the internet, maybe you can trouble shoot it yourself.

Monkeysee's picture

You're not wrong to feel that way, but if you know it'll cause WW3 I wouldn't bother saying anything to your DH. Lord knows he'll use it against you if you did anyways..

As for the lack of food & AC, is there bread, eggs, noodles, etc in the house?  All those things are cheap, but it's still food. Food that your DH needs to be buying, but still food.  They won't starve as long as there's something for them to eat, even if it's not the food they want.

The AC.. well that sucks but it's not the end of the world.  Get some fans & learn to love cold showers until you can afford to get it fixed.  Skids can learn to live with it, there are plenty of worse things that could be happening to them than having to live without AC.

tog redux's picture

OP, you go stay with friend/family/hotel and let DH stay with his sweaty, hungry kids. 

whoops, didn't mean to say that as a reply to you, Monkeysee. 

Monkeysee's picture

Oooooo yes, this!

I figured you didn't but I like this suggestion better than what I wrote lol.

lieutenant_dad's picture

If DH couldn't pay for at least half to fix the AC, I'd go buy a small window into for my bedroom and then just turn my room into my sole sanctuary until it was fixed. $100 at Walmart will get you a good room-sized AC unit. $15 more will get you a locking doorknob.

Siemprematahari's picture

I wouldn't tell him anything. Let him figure it out and focus on you. Stick to your guns on not purchasing more food only when its necessary and try to keep yourself from being around them to save your sanity. You are probably worrying more about this than your H is. He doesn't seem to bothered by the food situation. The kids will survive not having AC heck it may give them a reason to be outside and enjoy the out doors.

momjeans's picture

This is most likely how I would handle it too, though I do see the logic in thinking they should go back to BM’s if dad is unable to provide life necessities like food.

bananaseedo's picture

Do you plan on going all summer with out the AC?  Was that you in middle of the night messing w/the AC I saw to sabotage the skids stay?  LOL (could hae been a plan we all came up with haha).

I'd say stay away as much as you can this summer-I wouldn't say anything but stick to your guns of not buying anything for them and let him deal.  Let them bitch to him about being hot and sweaty.  That really sucks though.  I live in the South and know all about how now AC can feel even for a day.  

What is the plan? They stay home all day? How old are they?  Who is home w/them? If he is then he can take them to a pool/the mall/grandparents to stay cool.  

tankh21's picture

LOL...I don't know what his plan is. The skids are 12 and 14 and DH works from home so they are home all day with him. I am trying not to make it my problem for my own sanity. I would hope that the AC gets fixed soon but who knows. I can stay with family anytime I want to.

lieutenant_dad's picture

This was where I was going with my question. Being unemployed at home is not the same at working from home.

tankh21's picture

He started a business building custom homes with another guy. He does the construction part.

ESMOD's picture

Do they have business?  Wouldn't he have to leave the house to "construct" something?

tankh21's picture

My DH is an architect. He does the blueprints and budgets for the custom homes. They have subcontractors that do the construction. Sorry I didn't clarify that.

ESMOD's picture

If I recall ... tomorrow is grocery day.  They will survive till tomorrow.  I am guessing their IS food.. just not their precious lunchables... (which you should NOT buy this week). 

This week, make a better plan for "kid food"... here are some options that are fairly cheap and generally are things a kid can eat and won't break the bank.  Some might require a little adult assistance to make.. but your DH isn't doing anything anyway.

Generic Mac n Cheese

Ramen

Cheap hot dogs & store brand buns.

homeade lunchable fixings: Ritz crackers (or store brand) bologna/ham/turkey lunch meat & American cheese.

Generic or brand name Spagetti-os or raviolis.

bag of pizza rolls

totinos or store brand single serving pizzas.

Make pitchers of sweet tea (if your southern..lol).. or generic Kool-aid drink. (5 lb bag of sugar and the drink mixes are cheap)

popcorn (maybe generic microwave or bulk popping kernels)

bag of store brand pretzel sticks..

bag of store brand cheese sticks.

store brand mix with milk "no cook" pudding

Jar of generic PB and Jar of Jelly

2 loaves of store brand bread.

Those things are affordable and most any kid can eat them...  Your DH needs to be a bit more involved in the food though so that he can make things last next time.

 

AC busted?  oh well, if kiddos complain to mama, she is likely to insist they come home.

tankh21's picture

Thank you ESMOD. The skids will complain to her most likely but that is not my problem. I mean because they do need to go back to BM's any way since DH cannot afford stuff.

ESMOD's picture

Nope.. not your problem.  In fact, I might task your DH of going out himself to grocery shop for his kids.  Take you out of the loop on that... but of course.. that will likely leave him short on his share of bills you pay together.

Harry's picture

First buy real food. Eggs, pasta rice, chicken, PB&J.  So you have enough food for the week,  Maybe not what evetybody wants. But real food before anything else is bought. Screw the lunchables.  Let DH who is not working but playing from at home. Figure out the snacks 

ITB2012's picture

But I hate air conditioning. I think it's too cold, but the rest of the household likes it to feel like late fall in the middle of summer. Shade the windows and turn on fans to get air circulating. When it cools off at night, suck the cool air through the house.

As for no food in the house: you know no matter how much food you have in the house, there will be no food in the house per the kids. Duh.

 

 

mollygreen22's picture

I LITTERALLY just got into an augument with my husband over this.  We have 1 air conditioner and its on its last legs its a suna in my apt,  I just paid all bills so were a little short this week.  He had the nerrrrrve to be like oh and my son wants to come over this weekend! * crickets * -  a little backround we live in a 1 bedroom apt with our daughter, and when he comes over the sleeping arrangement is HELL we have had him every weekend for the past 2 months hes supposed to come every other weekend and if there is any time i needa break its NOW.   After my long pause, im like oh ok whats he eating for dinner because i have no problem making a nice bowl of cereal,  we are stuggling this week and im not spening my last pennies on a gourme meal.   _ another side note his son hates everything i make and wants specials meals and eats 14 times a day,  my daughter on the other hand eats what we eat.  We didnt really resolve anything so now ill be walking on egg shells hoping i dont hear him comming up the steps tomorrow and praying my husband put his common sence hat on. 

tankh21's picture

Yeah I don't get the logic that these men have. I mean we get it you want to see your kid/kids but we shouldn't have to make special accommodations for them when they come to our house. It's ridiculous because my DH wants to not look like a bad father in front of BM and his family but in reality the kids are going to tell BM what happens any way so what is the point of taking them if they simply cannot afford it. Visitation is voluntary. While I know it wouldn't be fair to ask my DH to give up his visitation we shouldn't be asked to give up something or give up our money for skids.

tankh21's picture

That is true but I can go to my family's house LOL and let me DH and the skids sit in the heat.

Cooooookies's picture

Go to your family's house and don't give it another thought.  Here's more cheap food ideas for your DH when HE goes shopping:

Store brand for everything:

Cereal and milk, 

refried beans and el milagro tortillas- they are like 35 cents a pack,

Box of 60 eggs from Walmart is only $4.36, with 32oz frozen southern hash browns  $2.24,

Pancake mix, just add water with store brand toast,

Egg fried rice using store brand bag of rice and soy sauce, 

5lb bag of frozen chicken legs and bbq sauce

Pack of 2 whole chickens, use meat for various dishes

Frozen mixed vegetables.  I am the queen of cheap Smile