Being Disengaged!
I am disengaged for 5-6 months approx. I am feeling really good. 
It had helped me lot. I don't do anything for my SS12. Avoid him at every cost.
I don't cook for him.
I don't clean his room, it is not cleaned since 5-6 months as I haven't entered the room. DH doesn't bother about it, then why should I. }:)
I don't tell him to bath, or clean his teeth :sick: (if he comes for 2 weeks, he don't brush for 2 weeks; neither does at BM house).
One thing does disgust me is that and gets me irritated, he don't wash his hand after coming out from toilet (long or short one) doesn't matter. :sick: :sick:
How can one be so unhygienic? (He is allergic to almost everything just like I am allergic to him) My advice: Go wash your self from head to toe for God's sake. 12 year old :jawdrop:
I don't ask how are you? Hi, Bye , nothing... Had enough of his fake attitude!
Basically, he doesn't exist for me now and life is much better now. Even if DH tells/inform something about him, I just change the topic ( talk about new movie or what I read , any topic around the word and universe but him. )
I am thrilled to know that it really helps. I don't think about him, or his presence in my life. I feel like I have control of my life back in my hands.
I would like to know what you have experienced? Does it work for you?
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I also think that he is
I also think that he is allergic to himself.
Pig must be stinking less than him. Seriously!!
My SS don't ask me anything
My SS don't ask me anything now. He can't even open a wrapper of a lollipop. He says his hand hurts. Don't like to go to beach because his foot hurt if he walk on sand. :jawdrop: :?
You really don't need to resent. Neither do i now.
I just give a blank look
I just give a blank look (I've perfected the completely blank look) for a few seconds then talk about something completely un-skid related.
I, too, am done trying. The bathroom one is one I do go off about, though, because I don't want filthy hands touching everything in my home. I've even gone so far as to say "I don't want your child's PENISY hands touching the lightswitches that I need to turn off after he leaves them on all over the house! MAKE HIM WASH HIS DAMN HANDS AFTER HE GOES TO THE BATHROOM!"
Me too. DH: SS did bla bla
Me too.
DH: SS did bla bla bla.
Me: It is a nice weather outside.
DH: SS like bla bla bla....
Me: I would like to eat ice cream.
The day my DH told him to have a bath, he just dried himself off with my dog's towel which I was going to do in wash.
Beside that he is still using a same towel for idk how long. :? Anyways I got a new towel for my dog.
I had told my DH too, SS goes and put his hands under water (without soap) for 5 secs or so and then wipe them on his pants. Even more disgusting. :sick:
I love being disengaged! I
I love being disengaged! I actually started off disengaged because I don't relate well to children and I don't have any of my own. But as time passes I find more and more ways to become even more disengaged ... and the more I do it, the better I feel.
SD leaves dirty dishes sitting out? I don't touch 'em. SS needs a ride from me? Oops, sorry, I'm busy. I grocery shop for them, but only because if I don't their dad will blow a fortune on the highest-priced brand-name junk food the store carries.
Big holiday meal? I always make sure to invite my brother, his wife, and their daughters too, so that all of the focus isn't on my step kids and so that I can ignore them more. It irritates my fiance that I invite my family, too, because he believes it takes away somehow for his kids to have to share their holiday with people who aren't related to them, but he is smart enough not to say anything to me and I just ignore his indications of irritation. Because this is my family, and it is my holiday celebration too. Not everything is all about the kids despite what he wants to believe. By the way, guess who the only people who don't offer to help clean up are?
I felt very guilty in the
I felt very guilty in the beginning but after reading stories about other stepmom here, I thought that there is no need to be have a feeling of guilt. He is not my responsibility. All I wanted for my SS was for his own well being. But I have learnt my lessons and let it go. And I feel very great now.
Ya. I can imagine. All about Skids. Doing nothing in house. If he pick up his own plate then my SS thinks he had cleaned the whole house. I have just told him if I see anything of your laying around in living room or any other room beside his own, I will throw it in garbage. He didn't do what I said. I threw those things in garbage. Felt so good! }:) }:)