While the oldest 2 steps hate, loathe and despise me, other than when they try to use me, my youngest 2 steps actually love me, most days.
I don't understand how the oldest 2 steps can accept and embrace their stepdad, whom their mother was dating while still married to my husband when he was deployed but can't even be civil most days with me. My husband and I dated years ago before their mother was in the picture and only got back together after their divorce yet they think I'm the home wrecker. I don't get it.
I've had an off again, on again relationship with the next to youngest who used to refer to me as stepmonster in a negative connotation but now we're even closer than she and her bio mom or dad. I took the "nickname " and embraced it much to her dismay at the time and started calling her Beastie. Since our relationship turned for the better and the later release of the movie Maleficent we have even taken to buying each other everything we can find with the movie reference. We couldn't be closer. She finally (and hopefully permanently) got over her mothers bad mouthing and brainwashing.
The youngest, only boy of the steps, has always embraced me and was the #1 cheerleader for his father and I to get married. He used to call me S mom, until the older 2 tattled on him to their mother and he got punished and beaten. His mother wants him to call me Miss _______, she wasn't too thrilled when I corrected her that I am no Miss, he can either refer to me by my first name alone or by Mrs _____ as I am married. He has it the hardest of them all I think. He's even broke down crying to me before saying he wanted to come live with dad but didn't want his mom to not love him anymore.
it's a sad state of affairs when people use their children as pawns. I am all for my children have more people to love them, not less ,apparently with the ex that only applies to her new husbands family.