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You miss what, exactly?

SubstituteMommy's picture

SD9 has been out of state on her summer visit with her BM for two weeks now. She was supposed to stay for two more weeks, but now it's three because her BM got coronavirus and I'm adamant that SD stays away from my kids as long as possible.

She called last night and sounded annoyed. She was being short and unfriendly, as though someone forced her to call. Anyway, her dad was like, "I miss you," so she insincerely replied, "Miss... you... too."

Things have been AMAZING without her around. Less fighting (between my SO and me), no drama, no lying, no sneakiness, no misbehaving, no rule breaking, no disrespect, no dirty bathroom, no wasting of food, no stained clothing, no pity parties, no fakeness, no attention seeking... I mean, the list could go on and on! I am enjoying her absence to the fullest and I seriously wish that her BM had full custody instead of her dad. After this, I won't get another break from the kid until October and it will only be for one week. I asked my SO out of pure curiosity, "What exactly do you miss?" His answer was, "Who she used to be."



Evil3's picture

"What exactly do you miss?" His answer was, "Who she used to be."

Wow! That is telling. Your DH does in deed see his precious for who and what she really is. Appreciate this moment because if your DH is anything like mine, these moments in which our DHs admit clarity on their darlings are very very rare.

SubstituteMommy's picture

He definitely has his moments! It's rare though. When it's inconvenient for him to be honest about her, he goes in the complete opposite direction and tries to convince himself that she is everything that she isn't. Those times are hysterical, but also super pathetic and irritating.

justmakingthebest's picture

Wow.... that must have been hard for him to admit. 

Good for him for saying it though.

SubstituteMommy's picture

Yes. I just wish that his moments of clarity were more than just rare moments. I wish that he could be consistent in his thoughts and opinions instead of flipping the switch and acting like she's perfect the next time she gives him the attention that he desperately craves from her.