My anxiety is through the roof!
SD9 was supposed to be out of state visiting her BM for four weeks (she lives with us full-time). Her BM contracted COVID-19, so four weeks turned into five. Her grandmother contracted it, so five weeks turned into six. Her half-brother contracted it, so six weeks turned into seven. It has been absolutely marvelous without her around. The biggest break I ever had in the last six years was TWO weeks. Can you imagine what kind of mental vacation it has been for me to have SEVEN weeks off? Our home is calmer, happier, and there's no drama. I didn't have any moments where I felt disgusted, hateful, or unattracted to my SO. We got along well and I feel like we have become a lot closer. He has even admitted how different things are when she isn't around.
Well, SD was tested a couple of days ago and her results came back yesterday (negative). She is currently on her way back and I am absolutely dreading it. My anxiety has been so bad since my SO got the text saying that she would be back this afternoon. After getting a real taste of what life would be like if custody was flipped, I truly don't even know if I can go back to her being here.
I feel so bitter because I have been so happy without her here and she has been perfectly fine and happy with her BM. She called us four times in the seven weeks that she was there and she was rude and aloof every time. She won't be gone again until October, and that's only for one week. After that, she won't be going to visit her BM until March, and that's only for one week as well. Her BM only has to deal with her a few weeks out of every year, but I have to deal with her all the time. It all just feels so unfair.
I will undoubtedly cry when she gets back. Wish me luck.