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strugglingSM's picture

I had a terrible day, unrelated to my SSs today, but was pushed over the edge when I walked into our family room and saw all of their gaming gear sitting all over the floor. I bought them a basket to put everything in and somehow, nothing ever ends up on there, so...

...I threw everything in that basket and hid it in the closet. When I opened the closet, I saw other toys that I had stashed there after they were left sitting out. They completely forgot about those toys, but they'll notice that the gaming gear is gone.

I admit, it made me feel a little better...


Cover1W's picture


lieutenant_dad's picture

My boss recommended donating toys to the foster care supervised visit centers since most of the toys that get donated and/or are acquired are old or broken. I will absolutely be looking into this option when we go through YSS's toys this fall.

Acratopotes's picture

I've done that before and always pretended not to have a clue what happened to it, not only with skid with bio as well..

hell I went as far as called X and said, I'm impressed brat cleaned the living room..... he told her he was proud of her following the rule... she could do nothing cause then she had to admit she did not follow the rule }:)

twoviewpoints's picture

You might try taking down two issues with one stone aka cellphone.

Any time that they fail to pick-up their mess, they lose the phones. For the entire weekend/week (whichever the schedule is). While the kids may be put out by their disappearing gaming systems, they can still play on their phones.

Take the phones when they arrive and they then have to 'earn' phone time. Leave crap out all over? Nope, no phone usage that day AND that gaming crap? Heh, lost it for the whole visit.

You'll hopefully get rid of the gaming mess (one way or the other) and you'll seriously curve their phone usage. Why take it away when they arrive? Because Dad pays for it and they could not be bothered to appreciate it by answering Dad's attempt of contact. So now they have to 'earn' the privilege. Dad and you decide what it takes to 'earn' phone time and how much time it 'earns'. Example , they picked everything up by time adults arrive home, they earn 15 minutes or a phone and two text.

They do their chores (clean room, carry out trash, whatever their tasks are) and they 'earn' more time for phone usage. Dad pays $80 a month for those phones. Phones don't come free. Well, neither do phone privileges during Dad's time.

If it works, you have kid mess free home, obnoxious in-coming/out-going phone usage drastically slows, and kid might think twice before they ignore Dad's attempt at contact. Use the d*mn phones as their 'currency''s the object they treat as most important and as if their lifeline. Use it against them.

Cover1W's picture

This only works if she has the authority by her DH to do so and I don't think she does.

Heck, I don't either.

She needs to learn what she can and what she can't disengage from.