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Feeling a little sad…

stepmom92's picture

So me, DH, BM, and her husband all get along. Her and her husband has a baby girl together. Anyway, DH always talks about her to people and it sometimes makes me sad. Not that I don't want a kid of my own, just idk it seems like he is treating her like his in some ways. Sometimes he will pick her up and hold her.  He will change her diaper, feed her, etc. I know I post a lot and I know you all have suggested therapy, but it sometimes bothers me. Having a baby isn't for me I don't think. I wouldn't have the freedom I have now. 

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SteppedOut's picture

Ok. This is kinda odd, I think. Your husband is talking about his ex-wife's kid to..."people"?

Like family and friends and he's gushing about her? Yea, that it is odd. 

Honestly, y'all hanging out to the point he's feeding/diaper changing is kinda odd. Did they divorce so they could bring 2 more people into the relationship... or? 

This would not be my cup of tea. 

stepmom92's picture

Well he recently told our coworkers about SD smashing her baby sisters finger the other day. And sometimes he has watched her along with SD and SS and has changed diapers and fed her then. Even my MIL asks about the baby sometimes too. 

Tried out's picture

and his wife adopted newborn twins, the big shocker was the way my granddaughter's mother - my son's ex - reacted. She and my son have a rather acrimonious relationship, to put it mildly. She lives to screw him over, even if in doing so she hurts herself.

But she was honestly excited about the twins and even bought them (lots of) presents. Her reaction was really unexpected.

I'm still not sure what caused it, but maybe it's because they are her daughter's siblings. She obviously feels some connection with them and that's the only thing I can come up with that makes any sense.

Maybe that's what's going on with your husband and MIL? 

bananaseedo's picture

I think we may be getting a tad closer to the crux of your issues.  Can I ask how come you dont' respond to any of the posts to your numerous other posts?  

notsurehowtodeal's picture

 You have asked for a lot of advice recently, but never seem to answer any of the questions that people ask on your posts. If you could interact a bit more on your existing posts, and answer some of the clarifying questions, you might be able to get the help you are seeking.

In addition to posting here, are you seriously considering some therapy just for yourself?

justmakingthebest's picture

Biological clocks are tricky things. Having a baby isn't for everyone- and that is OK! But that doesn't mean that your brain isn't releasing those hormones that make you long for a baby at times. Especially when you see your husband going all gooey over a baby.

To this day- and I am well past wanting more kids!- there is nothing sexier than a man taking care of a baby! I mean that makes my non-existent uterus skip a beat stuff right there! 

I would say to talk to your husband. Just tell him that it makes you have feelings that you haven't processed and if he could just throttle back a little on BM's other kid it would help make you feel a little better about where you guys are in life right now.