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DH Favoring his kids...

StepMadre's picture

So, i'm currently going through a rough time and I just had an emotional, upsetting conversations with DH and I feel super depressed and upset. Sad

Basically, we had a short, but long-overdue talk and I was so upset that I was pretty blunt about how I feel about him and the skids and their relationship. H strongly prefers SS6 to SS12 and although he loves them equally, he is just way, way more affectionate and loving with younger SS. With SS12 he seems to be constantly frustrated and isn't nearly as warm and loving with him as he is with SS6. It's not the age difference either, because it was the same thing when they were both younger. The horrible part is that SS12 is a way nicer, all-around nicer kid, even with his problems. SS6 is moody, sulky, angry, whiny, and is possessive and territorial when H pays attention to anyone but himself. It is revolting to watch and I am really frustrated because H just simply doesn't see it and refuses to admit it. Our conversation about that and other issues ended with me feeling awful and not knowing how to go about this... I've been crying all day and am just having one of those awful days.

Anyway, thanks for reading this, hopefully getting to vent a little will help me get through this.


LizGrace65's picture

Hey - I don't have any real helpful advice. Just wanted to let you know I read your post and I'm sorry you're going through this. Hang in there.


Anon2009's picture

Unfortunately, this happens a lot. I know my DH has done it too. He loves both his kids equally but he resented SD14 a little because he felt BM got pregnant with her to try and trap him. It took many years of his spending one on one time with each girl for him to let go of the resentment towards SD14. I felt bad, and I know he did (and does) too, because she didn't do anything wrong. All I can suggest is that he try to spend some time with SS12, bonding with him. And I think you should do the same with SS6. I think that can be a fair compromise you can make with him- if he spends some time bonding with SS12, you'll spend some time trying to work on your relationship with SS6.