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SD26 Hates the Boundary

step-out's picture

Thanks to all of your support and my own sanity, I have set my boundary at "I will not discuss the past" with SD26. She tried to call back and said she wants to move forward too but not without the big "apology" I mentioned before. Also, that this "never happens again" - AFTER the big apology and blah, blah, blah - THEN she can enjoy being around me. Well, I listened to you all... she will always create drama and remind me of the past.

I won't stand for it. She told DH who said I don't know to her, but did mention to me that she is now on medication (I thought she was already) - She's squirming and squirming... she hates this boundary and will go non-stop to kick it out of place. How I'll every physically be around her again is another story.. my heart goes pounding with even the thought. Disengaging is great, but my mind knows I will eventually have to see her - UGH! 


hereiam's picture

She needs to let go of the apology, that is simply a control thing on her part. She just wants to see if she can get you to give one, she will then feel like she "won".

Also, that this "never happens again"

Then she needs to stop asking to spend the night.

THEN she can enjoy being around me

Haha! Like you care if she enjoys being around you. Her not enjoying being around you works just fine.

When you eventually have to see her, just be polite and civil, nothing more, like you would treat an acquaintance. Take your emotions out of it and don't let her pull you in.