You are here

sometimes, i just want to punch her in the face..

smnikki's picture

and tell her how stupid she is!

bm, who got knocked up, fh never loved, is now trying to get back with fh! She just called him at work to ask if she could stop by so they could talk. He said hell no, get a life and hung up. he doesnt even know what she wanted.

While im happy fh said what he did, im like wtf, if there wasnt a child involved and i lowered myself to her level, i would confront any woman chasing after my husband. it makes me so mad, that because of my ss i have to keep my mouth shut.

Last night she called him to say that ss was down at the neighbors playing, he was like why the f do i care? she continued by saying that my fh is a drunk and doesn't take care of ss when we have him, blah blah blah. He told her, you wonder why you're a failure in your current relationship? its because you call me and tell me your problems, call your bf and work things out with him. anything that doesn't involve my son i don't care about so stop calling me...she quickly said she had to go spend time with HER son...oh wait dumb a** i thought he was at the neighbors?

ugh, she is sooooooooooo annoying!

when my fh gets tired of dealing with his psycho horrible mother and bm, he tells me he is tired of being in the middle, and the only people who get hurt in all the fighting is him and ss. He told me that if i have a problem with mil or bm to handle it myself and he will back me up. so i said, okay if bm calls and talks about personal stuff i will take the phone from you, tell her shes an insecure beooch and leave you alone except to discuss ss, and if she doesnt her and i will have issues! he said fine, im just tired of dealing with it.

have any of you tried to handle things with bm yourself because h threw his hands up? how did it turn out? I personally think i should leave him to deal with it. I tell him he was the one that wanted an easy piece of a**, and this is all because of that, and for that reason i do not feel bad that he has to deal with, he should of thought of the consequences before he stuck it in a white trash Who*e.

ugh, i hate being so vulgar, but between bm and mil im going nuts. im usually a really nice caring person that gets stepped on, but with these two i see red.

Comments

Cheyenne Arizona's picture

She is trying to get under your skin, don't let her. I know, trust me, it is hard!

BMJen's picture

Handling things with the BM is a waste of time. If it comes straight out of your DH's mouth the woman still won't listen to it, there's no chance she's going to listen to you telling her. She considers you nothing (as most BM's do), doesn't care what you say, and anything that you do tell her to stop she'll just do that much more because she knows it pisses you off.

If your DH stands firm with her, like he did on that conversation, she'll stop eventually. She'll have no choice.

~Happiness is defined by the smile on your face, not the frown on others.~

Cheyenne Arizona's picture

I agree, can't fight with yourself. On the rare occasion our BM calls she gets voicemail EVERY SINGLE TIME. It works wonderfully.

Sasha's picture

and screen your calls. If it's not important and doesn't concern the sk, don't return the call. Then your FH won't have to worry about being in the middle.

Cheyenne Arizona's picture

Exactly

mrsparks's picture

She said Can you and I talk? Can I talk with just you, and you alone.. She wanted to meet DH an hour away without me so she could "talk" to him.

Ummm excuse me.. ARE YOU NUTS?! He told her, there's nothing we need to talk about, AND I'm not coming to talk to you without my wife, anything you have to say, you can say to her as well..

Needless to say she threw a fit, I guess no one told her, that I RUN THIS SH*T! lol Biggrin

smnikki's picture

that makes me laugh!!! considering that my fh has done everything i have asked him to, i guess my ss's bm needs to realize I RUN THIS SH*T! too!! lol

belleboudeuse's picture

The thing is, if you just ignore it, and whenever BM tries to get DH to talk to her about whatever is on her agenda, he just days, F off and hangs up, then she's left twisting in the wind, no one to talk to, no one to fight with, just a big ol' loony tune alone with her ridiculous self.

If, on the other hand, you get into the conversation and confront her, then it becomes An Issue, an ongoing discussion -- a fire that you'll be adding fuel to. It will burn out much, much more quickly on its own. I'm sure that if she wants DH back, she hates you, and it will make her very happy to know that she's gotten under your skin.

Don't give her the satisfaction of feeling like anyone takes her seriously. Your best defense is to ignore her and keep saying in your head what an insignificant creature she is. And give your DH a break too, by not talking about it except to compliment him on dealing with it so well. It sounds like he's kind of at the end of his rope with the situation. You'll punish BM much better by treating DH so well that he thanks his lucky stars every day that he's with you and not her (which I'm sure he does anyway).

Good luck!

BB

- You are not second best, you are not second class. Do not ever let anyone make you feel that way. (2Bloved)

WowjustWow's picture

If you ignore them, they eventually fade off. Let the phone go to VM every time she calls. You can even have FH tell her, if it's importnant you can leave a message. If it's not, I will not give you the time of day.

It will drive them nuts for a while, but they will get the point after a few months.

It's her way of trying to control FH's situation and life. He has to stay strong and not let her. Don't let him cave for her craziness.

I also suggest that you stay out of the middle. It's not a good place to be, and honestly, you'll be the one who takes the fall if something happens.

p.s. - I feel like punching BM in the face every time I think about her or hear her name. Wink

kaffonseca's picture

I did exactly what you said..I picked up my phone and called her out on it. FH was always coming home telling me how she would call him over dumb shytt at work..or he would show me the text messages she sent. So I told him to tell her to "stop calling over dumb shytt" She would call him 3 different times with insurance questions..saying it had to do with their son..ok..fine..but that is what the 1800 # on the back of the card is for.

So finally I had it...I picked up my phone..actually I think I picked up his phone (cuz' she wouldn't answer my #) and called her....asked her point blank WHY...that she looked like a fool cuz' he told me EVERYtime she called or texted and that he wanted nothing to do with her other than their son...she made me put FH on phone and asked if that was true..and he said yes..I've told you before..and you need to get a life (I'm sure he had more balls just cuz' I was beside him)...

At first she bitched and moaned and tried to say that since they couldn't be "Friends" than he couldn't see his son! WHAT!!! yea..that didn't last long..she's an idiot..BUT she got the picture and rarely talks to FH now...she NEVER calls or texts anymore.

"He grew up in my heart, not my belly"

smnikki's picture

after she called to ask if she could stop by so they could talk, and he said heck no....she never tried to talk or call him again. SS called to talk at night but she didnt say a peep. Guess it was really important, huh?

HummingBirdHunny's picture

BM has called my husband before to ask if she can talk to him alone but I know it's nothing to do with getting back with him, she just wants to bitch about me and whatever I may have said or done but he also always tells her if you have something to say you can say it in front of my wife. That pisses her off to no end. In the beginning she hated that he ALWAYS made decisions with my opinion included. She expected to get him to do what "she" wanted regardless of what my say was in the matter. Now she knows differently and may not like it but respects it for the most part and if not, oh well!

Just make your husband stand his ground and stay out of it. And if she doesn't already then you should try to switch the communication to emails only or in writing by mail if she doesn't have email access. Unless it's an emergency then she shouldn't call.