Shoud Sd12 be able to do extra..... Need suggestions
Hi gals! I'm in desperate need of advice. My sd12 who has ben giving me absolutely, positively a hard time since Christmas. Only following rules for a little but after she is lectured about the rules. Then she is back to being lazy, not listening, doing only what she wants even though I know what she is doing...she is getting ready to go to her bm for the summer.
The question I need help with is whether she gets out to do the activities that she ask.. She wants to go out for cheerleading but I don't think she deserves it...
But, I feel bad about not letting her do it, but on the other hand I dont give a damn either.... Make any sense?
She hasn't brought a single school paper home for 3 months unless it needs a signature on it. School is out and she had thrown them all away at school. I got right in her face after she gave me that blank look and I don't know about six times. Asked her if she knew any better and told her I was done.
If she is going to live in my house she better get on board or she could go back where they lived before with no air conditioning, no carpet, her room had no windows etc...
Her bd says to make an impression on her by embarrassing her, making fun of her. I say that's not being a parent, that's being a buddy. I don't see how that type of behavior is considered parenting...
If any one could give me suggestions or opinions I would greatly appreciate them....
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Comments
If she is going to go out for
If she is going to go out for something that she wants to do then she needs to step up in the house and help. Following the rules is a must. Make a her sign a contract. If she has chores then give her a dealine. If its not done then she doesn't go to the follow event. If she starts missing out on things that she wants to do maybe she will start acting better. Worked for me. My father taught me the value of money at an early age. If I wanted to borrow money before I got my allowance then he charged me intrest. Good lessen for me. Good luck. Your dealing with a teenage girl.
I dont know I think
I dont know I think extracurriculars are a privilege not a right. They should be doing schoolwork as assigned, making good grades, maintaining good school behavior, and generally following rules at home. I know noone is perfect so I dont believe if she is doing everything correctly but forgets to take out the trash once that she should not get to participate. But I would shoot for -compliance at least 75% of the time-and the grades would be a must for me-all c's and above. But that's how I roll. Evidently alot of parents dont. My ss gets failing grades, suspensions, etc and still plays baseball. My dh suggested to bm taking it away and she acted like he was suggesting abuse.
The contract is not a bad idea-I dont know if the cheerleading is for next year? If so she has all summer to impress upon you that she deserves this privilege. Also, I understand teh idea of a committment, but if my kids are not living up to what they need to do the very first thing to go is extracurriculars. Their first committment is to their parents and family.
Thank you! My sd12 is gone
Thank you! My sd12 is gone for the summer to her mom's, I tell you I felt such a relief when we left knowing I would not have to put up with her or her issues. I know her bd my dh is going to miss her but I won't have to worry about what she wants to do, what he wants to do, etc....
Sd gets a's and b's in school, but she tried to get dad and I to do her homework for her by saying she doesn't understand or can't find the answer in the chapter.
The cheerleading is for next year, but I an thinking that she should be required to do her responsibilities at home first.p agents see sports as a reason for kids to do sports, they are gone a lot! Good deal in my thought. But at the same time u have freedom.