Maybe I’m selfish
I think about that a lot. Maybe I am selfish for not wanting to deal with my horrible stepkids. Maybe I am selfish for starting to resent my DH for feeling like I am stuck here. My BS is launched...a did my job and raised him to be a good human. Now I am ready to begin pre-retirement. But I can't because DH wants to wait until YSS has graduated.
Maybe I am selfish for not wanting to spend money on his kids and would rather fix my hiuse up so i can sell it. Maybe I am selfish for hating it when my skid is here.
But just maybe I am selfish because no one in my life has ever sacrificed for me as much as I have for them. No one has done for me like I do for them. So maybe I have to be selfish so I don't drown in despair by losing myself in their wants and needs.
Looks like I am just going to keep being selfish!
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Comments
It's not selfishness, you are
It's not selfishness, you are saddled with yet one more ungrateful soon to be PASed skid who treats you like crap. It's not selfish to not want to help financially or emotionally support that.
You're not selfish, not in
You're not selfish, not in the least.
What do you want to do in pre-retirement? Take more time off to travel? Do that, even if it's just long weekends and even if DH won't go with you. Start a new hobby or business? Ok, do it. Move to a smaller house? Ok, investigate it.
Don't let DH's skid obligations, real and imagined, stop you. There might be compromises, but if you can feel like you've made some steps to fulfilling some of your own dreams, it's a decent start.
Nope you are not selfish..at all
Its not selfish to think about yourself..you are not Joan of Arc after all. There is nothing noble in sacrificing everything for people that DO NOT CARE, aka Skids. Our DH 's would like us to to do that..because it is easier for them. I told DH one time..I didn't sleep with it and create the two skids. Anything I do for the skids is because I am being nice and don't mistake my being nice as a weakness. You will find out that I can be a stone cold bitch if I have to.
Nope you are not selfish..just at a different point in your life than DH.
Self care is not selfish...
I attended a virtual women in business luncheon and they woman speaker said this "Self care is not selfish". It felt good to hear that because as steps we are often treated as if doing anything for OURSELVES when no one else is = selfish. This is not true! Self care is IMPORTANT. Ever since that luncheon I have been telling myself this little quote daily.
Exactly
Boundaries n tough love are healthy not selfish