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Just watching the Skid circus unfold

Shieldmaiden's picture

So, the SD's left for their BM's house yesterday and DH got called into work for an emergency, so I had the afternoon and the house to myself. SD's wanted my sympathy because they had to get up at noon to be at their BM's house for a picnic gathering of BM's boyfriend and BM's boyfriend's kids. BM is having fantasies of living together and getting married and having a blended family....and living happily ever after. BWAHAHAA!  Sorry. I tried to stifle that evil laughter but it just came out.

DH has made no mention of resuming SD 18's family therapy. SD18 is still refusing to talk about how her most recent job ended. She acts like its too traumatizing, so instead she is eating giant bowls full of cookie dough while playing the SIMs online. In two months, she will be 19. Still no driver's license, job or hopes to go to college. DH is still washing and waxing SD16's car for her, changing out her headlights, and has not said one word about her leaving in the middle of the night to go to SD20's apartment. So its business as usual. DH said he felt bad that he got angry with SD16 because she kept warning him to not mess up her car (she knows nothing about cars and he has done car repair before.) Then, when he asked her to help, she huffed and said "Forget it, I'll just get Mama to do it for me!"  Imagine that!~ I would get mad too, if I had spent all afternoon washing and waxing the ungrateful little turd's car, and fixing her headlight, only to have her throw that in my face. But DH just doesn't see it yet. He is starting to, but you can see the war in his brain over feeling guilty vs. righteous anger - and its a tossup which side wins. 

I am having fun planting "failure to launch" videos on SD18's youtube channel. I made sure to like and subscribe!  I took SD16's key to our house due to the fact that she is sneaking out in the middle of the night and possibly letting SD20 in while we are asleep. I am hiding all baking supplies so that I won't be finding dirty cookie dough bowls and spoons all over my kitchen at 6 am, from their previous nights sugar-orgie. SD16 was clicking her little salon press-on nails together and worrying that ordering pizza for dinner one day this week was going to "give her a migraine" due to the salt content. I smiled and reminded her that she she had eaten 4 boxes of Kraft Mac and Cheese, 1 bag of Top Ramen, Cookie dough, potato chips, and 2 cans of Spaghettios, and that if she didn't already have a migraine, it had nothing to do with her salt intake. The look on her face was pure consternation. I think she realized that she is full of shit. No worries, tho - she will forget by next week and be whining about the same things all over again.


stepmomnorth's picture

Wow that is a lot to deal with it. Your SDs seem like they have it real good... But don't realize that.... They have it real good. 

TrueNorth77's picture

I just can't with these Bio Parents who allow their children to graduate, turn 18+, and not have a job or any kind of plan to launch. WHY. It helps no one. The kid is learning no life skills or getting any sense of direction as to what career to pursue. They aren't saving money. It pisses off Step-parents. It is the most nonsensical thing I have heard, and yet I keep seeing it happen. 

Kaylee's picture

This!!! I cannot agree more. No kid should be allowed to leave school, have no plan and just expect to lie around being supported.

Funny story: my cousin's wife told me that their son aged 19 had dropped out of university after his first year. he rang his parents and said he wanted to move home and take a year out, to find himself. LOL.

She said to him, yes you can move home but you won't be sitting around finding yourself. A good friend of hers manages one of the local supermarkets: she went in and ORGANISED a full time job for sonny boy in the delicatessen/fish section. Immediate start, as soon as he arrived back in his home town. 

She told me "no kid of mine is going to leech off me when he is perfectly capable of working" Love it!!!

TrueNorth77's picture

Even if you allow your kid to live at home as they determine the long-term plan, there is zero reason why they shouldn't be working in the interim.  

Cover1W's picture

Yes hide the things. I did that with many kitchen items that were not taken care of properly (like wood spoons and ceramic knives left in a heaping sink half full of water) or left out dirty.

They will ask where stuff is. "I don't know" is the answer and make super sure it's well out of their snoop area. Because they WILL look for it.

daisydiamond82's picture

Oh my goodness. I love your style. Yes, hide all the things. My school of thought is if they can't respect the stuff that everyone uses (cookware, dishes, etc.) then they don't deserve to use it whenever they want. 

Shieldmaiden's picture

Oh yeah, and DH had to go wake them up ( SD's 16 and 18) because they were still in bed at 11 am when we left to go grocery shopping. I told DH "What? They don't have alarm clocks or phones to wake them up?" DH got annoyed with me questioning his motives, and said "I would do the same for YOU if you overslept!"  But of course, I don't oversleep very often because I set 3 alarms to wake myself up, in case I sleep through one or two.  The skids, on the other hand, don't set alarms, and act surprised when they oversleep a very important event, then blame DH for not waking them up. I just can't.....why infantilize young adults? Why?   Why am I the bad guy for suggesting they take a little bit of initative?

Cover1W's picture

And I learned never to give any suggestions or thoughts about ANYTHING regarding SDs growing up and becoming more responsible. NADA.

So if no alarms are set, ignore. If they were supposed to go with you, and your DH doesn't make sure they are ready in time, you go by yourself. And a trip to the store becomes a trip for food just YOU want. He can take them separately.