SS swearing now biomom sending emails to biodad saying I have no business speaking to her kids like that.
Biomom is such a piece of work...Thanks for the advice on step son swearing. Biomom has sent emails to her ex husband stating I had no business disciplining her kids adn that she should come over and speak to my kids....(not exactly sure on how she thinks that has anything to do with it)?????and the oldest boy said he is happy he never has to come to my house again.. I am sure that is just her talking, but you know I really dont want him around anymore. He is rude, their mother is rude and their father tries to put the law down with them....and they really dont care....I really don't think I am the right person for the stepmom job...these step kids are just from a totally different kind of family then what I am used to. I teach my boys respect, and to treat everyone as they want to be treated. As for the xmas gifts, I am taking all the ss gifts back and getting him a lump of coal and an orange. He is just a ungrateful little )((&%%%^&&. a true product of his mother. unfortunately.
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Man, I know your pain.
But in all honesty, when my SS's BM came yelling with similar complaints, my DH stood his ground and made it very clear to her that this is MY HOUSE. I am an adult to be reckoned with. We, together, set rules and when SS crosses those boundaries in our home, there are consequences to those actions that he must suffer, period.
It's hard, but truthfully, you have to ignore what she says. It's just another form, a mechanism of control for her. If SS doesn't want to abind by your house rules and respect you, then by all means let him stay with his mother. Those are the consequences that he has to live with. If all of a sudden he wants to come over because mom upset him somehow, then guess what... sorry, you broke the rules here. How can I trust you will behave and respect our house rules? This is how it is... you come here, there are rules, you follow them, and things will be great. You break them, and this is what will happen.
Kids today have no idea what real responsiblity is. They do not have resposiblity for themselves, or their actions, because some adults just seem to make excuses for them. It makes me soo sad how kids are acting these days. Soooo many parents want to be their kids best friend, when they sooo need a parent to stand firm and do as they say they will.
If he's rude, then ignore him all together. Go out of your way to be extremely nice, smile alot, do fun and great things for the rest of the family, invite him into the activity, if he makes snotty comments or refuses, smile nicely and say... Okay. It's all for attention. But by no means feed into it.