sadlonelyone's Blog
Update: DH hasn't talked to BM yet about abuse language toward SD14
To recap from last night, I texted SD to check on her and she told me this:
"I keep getting into arguments with mom and SF. and last night SF said the only way to teach me respect would be to beat me, then he said maybe it'd be better if they put me in a foster home and let someone else have me.
He also told me that he was gonna take the kids and leave in front of mom and the kids
That's not what mom said, she told me that it was all my fault, everything , the arguments, me failing school, SF being mad all the time, the messed up family dynamic, everything."
SD14 crying to come back after TWO 600 mile moves in less than a year, BM and SF threatening foster care and SD fears SF will hit her
All of the title. To refresh: SD lived with us 5 months and decided to go back to BM in March. SD called DH late last night saying she is in fear of being physically abused, SF is threatening to take their mutual kids, and they both threatened to send SD away to "foster care" for not doing so well in school and I'm sure for SD's defiant attitude..
DH doesn't want to tell SD14 about SIL's death and BM said she wants to be there to comfort SD
DH isn't talking about it right now but BM knows and texted him "to let her know when he's calling so she can be with SD." Advice from my previous post says SD should hear it from DH but I offered to call.
I hate BM but think one of us should tell SD. Would it be ok if I told her?
Sister-in-law dead at 35, SD14 doesn't know
She was an alcoholic and couldn't stop drinking. She had early cirrhosis at 30 and also had heart issues that she was medicated for. Her son will be 12 in less than a month and lives with his dad after SIL lost custody 5 years ago. She's been to the ER and rehab too many times to count. Their mom died at 53, 14 years ago when SIL was 21 and she never really recovered from that and losing custody was her excuse to keep drinking.
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BM accusing us of claiming SD on taxes
When I don't even know SD's SSN, it doesn't benefit us as we don't get EIC with our other 2 kids, didn't get an extra $1400 of stimulus, and haven't fit the criteria of being a primary residence ever. When will BM stop always blaming DH for her shortcomings and trying to keep herself relevant?
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SD14 didn't text or call for my birthday
I don't know why I was at least expecting a text but I was.. my bday is St. Patty's day so I was 99% sure she would remember. I texted DH this morning and said she didn't say anything and he said "she probably doesn't know" and I asked if he really thought she didn't know after 9 years and he said "idk but I don't think it's worth being upset about."
He's right so not sure why I even care. I'm not talking to my own SM so maybe I'm just sore that she didn't call yesterday, either.
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Disenrolled SD from school today and dumb things BM makes up
I've been posting about SD moving back to our home state with BM after 6 months here. BM tried to keep SD at the school in our state online until the end of the year but they told her no. When I returned SD's things this morning, they asked where SD's new school was and I had no idea..
I vented to the counselor a little and said that none of this was our plan and she told me to have BM call when they know where the transcripts are going.
Update: just when I thought I couldn't hate BM any more
I hadn't seen her in 2 years but caught a glimpse when we dropped SD off Saturday, unfortunately. For reference, SD14 wanted a pixie cut 2 years ago but BM and SF told her it would make her look like a boy and she'd never get a job. I finally took her to cut her hair because it's hair and SD refused to take care of it and BM never helped her style it or take care of it. BM has always had long hair the last 10 years I've known her.
Update: I got SD kicked out of school and am kinda happy about it
SD14 lived with us 6 months in another state from BM. I knew it would end in SD going home but I thought she'd last longer. Anyway, I had told SD's teachers at least 3 weeks ago that she was going back to BM's state when this was decided. BM couldn't get SD back into her old charter school so Monday morning, 3 days ago, BM said SD will go to the school in our state online while living in another state. SD has never been to a public school.
Only a couple more years..
As I've posted before, SD is moving back to home state with BM after 6 months of failed schooling here with us. DH refused to attend SD's parent teacher conference last month "because he already talked to them about SD and he already knows she's failing and is going back to BM, anyway."
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