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Holidays, Oh Holidays... SIGH (of relief or resentment...TBD)

red flags's picture

So after this weekend's bratty behavior by soon to be SD10 at my fiance's nephew's wedding, tonight we had a discussion about our holiday plans for this year. We have SD10 this year for Thanksgiving and Christmas Eve, both of which are a big deal in my family. Last year, we had her for Christmas Day. My then SO brought her to my parents' house where she received a massive pile of gifts totaling over $1000 in value all themed around remodeling her bedroom (which hadn't been updated since she was an infant). She summarily snubbed her nose up at them and then stood up in front of my entire family and sang a little song she had improvised entitled "I Hate You All for Christmas." Needless to say, it was a disastrophy!

So after our discussion this evening, my now fiancé informed me that she would not be attending any of my family's holiday events this year. Consequently, neither will he. :(. Should I be jumping for joy that the little brat won't embarrass me in front of my entire extended family, or sad that because of her unchecked behavioral problems, my future husband and I will not be spending our holidays together?

I hate to admit (bc I'm usually good at disengaging) that this situation has me resenting her punk ass that we can't even expect good behavior on days where she will be showered with gifts and attention. Should I just get used to only having my husband every other year for family holiday events? He told me tonight that he expects she will be more mature at 12 (the next year we have T-giving & Christmas Eve w her) but I actually think she will be WORSE by then. And what happens when we have a baby? Do first kids always come first?

I can't believe I haven't posted in months and now I've posted twice in one day! Ugh... This little monster princess drives me nuts!

Comments

red flags's picture

That is pretty much my feeling on the situation. I hate to admit that I'm a little bit jealous that her bad behavior results in a loss for me. If she can't even be disciplined into good behavior for our holidays together, what is my wedding going to be like? And is a 10 year old sophisticated enough to see that she can have daddy all to herself if she just acts like a self-entitled little bitch. I want to just brush it off and enjoy ,y holidays with my family, but id be lying if I didn't say my feelings are a little hurt bc it feels like he chose her for all the wrong reasons. Sad Sad Sad

Jsmom's picture

He allows the behavior. You are not married yet, run now...Sorry, but it never changes and it only gets worse with these SD's. DH allows behavior that I would make my BS's life a living hell if he behaved as my SD did.

Yours reminds me of SD16 at that age....All about her all the time and he thought it was cute that she had so much personality.