SO, FDH and I go to couples therapy every 2 weeks ish. We don't currently live together and are trying to build this thing with a solid foundation so that before we dump a bunch of presure on it we have a chance in hell of surviving 6 kids under the age of 8.

Anywhoo, this week our counselor gave us homework: we are to establish a penalty box. It is basically this: We make a list of rules, and spell out the consequences for breaking each rule. Kids can not be assigned a chore for something not on the list- so if they do something we don't like the first one is free- after that it is on the list. Depending on the severity of the offense, either 1,2,3 or 4 chores are assigned per offense. For example: tattling on another kid gets you 1 chore, while hitting your sibling gets you 4 chores. An example of 1 chore would be to take out the garbage or wash 1 window. Expectations of how each chore is to be done is made clear in the beginning and that is it.

When a child is in the penalty box it is immediate- no TV, phone, bike rides etc. They can be in their room and that is it. We are not to harangue or otherwise pester the kids to do the chores- they are simply in the penalty box until they come to us and ask how many chores they have to do and which ones are assigned to them. As soon as the chores are done to our satisfaction we are supposed to praise a job well done and they get their privlages back right then.

FDH and I are supposed to have identical lists so that when we do co-hab the kids are already on the same rules and expectations.

SO, STALKers, what would you put on your list? Thoughts about how this will work? What chores would you put on the chore list?