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SD first visit for the summer

proud mom's picture

SD coming Friday for our first week of the summer. We get her every other week during the summer and last year we did not live together so this will be new to all of us we are use to having her every other weekend but a week to a 6yr is a long time. Any way, biomom called and left dh a message that sd has a Dr appt on the 21 and if he can't take her then "He" can drop SD off to her and she will take her and meet him or his parents after wards to drop SD back off. Hellooooooo, do I not exsist am I not capable to meet her at the Dr office with SD our kids go to the same peidtrician so it is not like I don't know where to go. Ughhhhhhhhh she gets on my nerves she actually said on her message, " YOU can drop her off to me on YOUR way to work or I can meet YOUR PARENTS or something" What the hell is something???? Is she talking about me with out using my name??? I just don't get it I do the majority of taking care of the kids mine and his they are all treated the same. If I shop for one I shop for all 3, I cook for them and clean up after them. I just don't understand why I am not recgonized as a part of her life. I love her and care for her as my own, I just don't get it. I pray that my ex will find someone how willcare for my boys as her own, I know she wouldn't take my place I am their mom but, I would hope she could care for them when I am not there to do it myself.


bonusmom's picture

I completly understand your frustration....I wish I could tell you it will get better but unfortunately when you are dealing with this type of ignorance it only gets worst...If I were you I would not even start meeting her to deal with the kids let your husband do it trust me I wish I would have never done half the things that I have done, it would have saved alot of headache and heartache had I just let my husband do all of the dealing with BM...It got to the point where BM would rather deal with me than with hubby, then for some unknown reason she told hubby she didn't understand why she always had to talk to me...but she was the one who would ask to speak to me I didn't just take over...anyway now I'm knee high in the shit and hate every phone call every face to face dealing basically anything to do with BM makes me sick...and I think if I would have never offered myself to try to help I wouldn't get so pissed off when she acts like a B%*@#....I wish you the very best ride on your roller coaster...GOOD LUCK>>>and hang in there...

Persephone's picture

talking about you without using your name. My DH gets the emails with certain words in caps--- WE need to talk about xzy... or OUR kids, YOU can take them shopping, blah blah... Definitely shows insecurity.. BUT wait YOU will be called upon when SHE has no other back up plan. Those are the times I suck it up and spoil them with ice cream or new clothes.

Dawn-Moderator's picture

I'm right there with you proud mom. I'm going through that right now. Bm used everybody she could before she had to settle on me to pick ss up from his summer band.

Oh well whatever. Bm has issues and I can't fix her. So I did what Persephone said. Yesterday after I picked ss up from band, I let him decide what he wanted for lunch. Then I took him and his best friend out to play miniature golf and ride the go-carts. They had a blast! Today we will be going to the water park.

Bm hasn't done much of anything with ss during the whole two weeks that he has been with her. Mainly because she won't go anywhere without her ex-boyfriend being along(according to ss) and he has to work on the weekends.

This is how sad it is. While I was driving the boys home from our fun day yesterday ss pointed out that he knew what kind of dead animal was up ahead in the road. His friend asked how he knew that and ss told him that his mom drove passed it with him one day!!! Wow! That's a good memory of his vacation with his mom!! I told him thanks for sharing that! It was like he was scraping to come up with something to say that he did with his mom.


proud mom's picture

I have already bought her some new summer clothes since she has out grown most of last years so I can't wait for her to get her and see her new clothes and a new 2 piece swim suit (mom won't let her have a 2 piece) so of course I bought her a little tankini it is soooooo cute and promised to take her for a girls day while she is here. All of this and she is only 6 but just think what she will have to tell Mommy when she gets home all we here about is grandmas house and her new baby brother keeping her awake at night. Someone has to give her attention so hey why not me?!

Live for today,you may not have a tommorow