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ProbablyAlreadyInsane's Blog

OT - Signed and Waiting on the court

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So last Thursday we finally signed the divorce papers. Very straight forward and simple, not much to split between us, just made sure I had my name back in there, we both kept our own debt, and we both kept our cars.  I had already gotten my stuff, so we both just signed saying whatever was in the other's possesion now belongs to them.

Honestly it's been relaxing, I didn't realize how stressed out and high strung it was making me, not to mention how self-concious about my clothing it was making me.  I feel a HUGE weight has been lifted off.

OT - Divorce *UPDATED*

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So OneLife's blog got me thinking. Yes there are the 5 stages of grief, honestly I think I finished most of those before I hit him with the dovorce news, it was like I KNEW it had to happen.  I went through the crying, the denial that it had to, then it was kind of just acceptance, and besides the fact STBX has been a pain in the a$$.  I've processed the grief for the divorce.

I am still however grieving for the girls, and I think that's going to take a LOT longer than grieving the divorce...

OT - Paperwork

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So I can voice my sheer annoyance.

Lawyer beginning of last week "your paperwork is good to go."
Me: "Awesome! I'll pay you ASAP!"

Thursday: *tax returns come in, so I pay him*

Me: "When can we get this signed and done with."
Lawyer: "It won't be ready until beginning of next week."
Me: "okay"

Today:
Me: "when and where can we get this signed this week?"
Lawyer: "I'll let you know when it's done."

 

OT - Update

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So it's been a bit, I've been in Indiana on a business trip, currently in 5 inches of snow and LOVING it (coworker not so much.  BUt I'm calling it Karma since he's been a d***.)

I officially got tax return money TODAY.  The lawyer has been paid, he's doing one more review of the papers, then we sign and we're done (assuming STBX doens't pull any s***, which let's be real... He probs will... BUT, I have proof of the infidelity, so I'd win in court.  I'll ahve the divorce either way).  I also recoupped the money STBX owed me from last month BEFORE I sent him anything.  SO yay me.

OT - Miscellaneous

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So not to brag or anything, but I had the BEST Valentine's Day dates.  Due to my lack of an H I celebrated with my doggos.  Coworker was out with his parents so we even had the house to ourselves.  Cooked up some steak and homemade mac and cheese and some veggies and chilled out and watched TV, I even went soft and gave both furbabies a SMALL piece of steak (they don't get people food.  I'm mean like that.)

 

OT - Update

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I had therapy last week... Which honestly went well.  We talked, she helped some of my mental stability.  We established that from talking to him and me.  That he loves control, which he perceives as actual love.  Which doesn't line up with my non-insane perception of love.  She asked if I felt things had improved at all, and I said no, so we chatted about that for a while.  I expressed several times that I didn't get why I still cared at all after all the s*** we'd been through because of him, she finally said that I definitely did know and we both know it's the girls.

OT - Better than it could have???

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So quick recap..  H cheated, emotionally abusive, yada yada.  Kind of crazy. (okay, lotta crazy), Used me as a nanny.  Got engaged to the b*** floozy he had an affair with, then came crawling back, I took him back, cue 10 more months of lies,  Me leaving, marriage counseling, and that roughly brings us to where we are now.  So I can recap the last week...

I went to Virginia on a trip, he accused me of cheating THREE TIMES while I was chilling in my hotel room alone,  Lots of obsessive and crazy messages,  I sent info to the lawyer so he can get the papers drawn up for me.

Welp. That did it.

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So as many of you know. Separated from H. He had an affair, is crazy, got engaged to the b*** he had an affair with, I (stupidly) gave him anoother chance, he continued to lie, I moved out, we did counseling, he's still a jacka$$, and now that brings us to last night.

OT - One Year

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I'm in the feels today. Today officially marks one year since H came clean about "everything."

There's not much more to it.  He was leaving for work, came back instead of going in, called and said he needed to "fix something."  Then we went out to the garage, and he lied initially. Said he had "just been flirting with this girl on an Instagram I didn't know about..." Then everything else slowly came out over the duration of that date and the days following.

One year.  And it sucks.

Holidays...

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So a quick run-down of my weekend for background.

Friday night, H, the girls, and myself went out for dinner and a movie.  We thought it would be light and fun, and SD11 is OBSESSED with Start Wars right now, so the new one came out, I offered to pay for it, and we were on our way.

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