Skids influence on young bio kids question
Hello, everyone. As some of you know, I have an almost 2-year-old toddler with DH and one on the way (currently in 3rd trimester). Skid will be here next month for his winter holiday visitation and as my toddler gets older I worry about skid's influence on him and on the new baby when they are old enough to understand and interact more. Last summer, I caught SS9 being aggressive with DS who was only 8 months at the time (when I was momentarily in the other room and he thought I wouldn't hear him/catch him). He also make sure to leave the play room when I come in (when DH is in there with him and DS). I trust my DH, but he's not the most attentive at times, and I know it just takes a second to pinch or push a baby or toddler when an adult's back is turned.
How do those of you who have younger bio children with your DH deal with influence and negative interactions with skids? Do you try to keep them apart? Supervise them at all times? What about if BM is filling your skid's head with negativity and resentment, making skid act out against your bios? What about when they get older? Have the skids tried to turn your bios against you? I know I sound paranoid, but this is my biggest fear - that a child who is being raised differently 80% of the time by someone who dislikes and resents me and my child will try to bring any negative crap around my kids.
FWIW, DH is not a Disney dad and he spends A LOT of one-on-one time with SS when he's here. But with the new baby coming soon, it will be harder to keep an eye on things since DH will likely be taking DS and SS out together so I can have time with the baby.
Also, how do your bios feel about skids if you yourself don't have much of a relationship with them or if they try to talk badly about you to your bios? I know they are half-siblings, but how important are half-sibling relationships, especially with a big age gap and a long distance situation?
Sorry for all the questions - it's just with the new baby being here soon that this stuff has taken up space in my head.