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SS7 can't be controlled so he's back in the hospital, and the law sucks today...

pixiedust10's picture

I am so furious and frustrated and heartbroken again today. It comes in waves, I'm okay for a few days, then something new happens, and it crushes my spirit all over again.

If you've been following, FDH has been trying to get custody of SS10 and SS7 for over seventeen months since bottom feeder BM sent an email "mistakenly" that she was going to move the SS's 2k miles away and live her own new life. She cannot care for the kids, they got taken away from her care by dfcs, and right before that she filed a restraining order (tpo) with a false statement that FDH abused SS7 that got dropped like a hot potato in court but not before the kids got taken from HER

SS7 has been uncontrollable with his foster care family that he was placed with for his special needs, and it got worse after he visited FDH and BM because now he wants to go home obviously, and nad a bad weekend, and even tried to jump out the window so he had a big cut across his nose, so he was taken to a children's hospital yesterday afternoon for evaluation by the social worker and got transported back a behavioral hospital last night. It's one of the two he's been to before. BM hates ths hospital because they told her it was more of a parenting and discipline issue than SS7 needing to be more medicated (she had him stoned out of his mind on 3 different meds so she could manage him). I wonder if she knows yet that he's there because it gets interesting...

The social worker for SS10 have had no issues with him, he seems to be fine with his family.

The social worker for SS7 has called FDH four different times since the visit at the center last week for him to try and get SS7 calmed down enough to transport him and reason with him, etc. They had not notified BM as of last night, or she wasn't told she could go to the hospital, assuming b/c when she was saying her goodbyes at visitation Thursday is when SS7 got all worked up and the social worker asked FDH go back in the room with her to get him calmed down.

So the social worker called FDH last night a few hours after notifying him that SS7 was going to the children's hospital and asked if he could please come up there and be with SS7 and try to calm and comfort him. I would think this is all great stuff in FDH's favor, right??? Well...then FDH spoke to this attorney and THIS happened:

The stupid DA in skid county has decided since dfcs in let this shit get to this point after numerous calls on BM by the hospitals and therapists, even though FDH has been trying for 17 mo to get custody, that both parents have been given every chance to take care of the boys, and there were allegations on both sides, even though hers were dropped I guess they are taking no chances now, so it's a mess. The DA is petitioning to have the kids stay in dfcs care for another 60 days, having both of them get psych evaluations, parenting classes, possible anger management (even though FDH has had an anger evaluation with no red flags). I'm so pissed right now. WHEN did they give BOTH parents a chance? Yeah they gave bottom feeder a billion chances, therapy, in home visits, social workers, medicaid, food stamps, special educational programs and recommendations, everything short of taking care of those damn kids for her, and look how far THAT shit went.

Almost funny, found out from the attorney that BM got upset that SS7 got restrained at new school while in foster care (she gets mad when anyone has to do this at any of the three schools he's been to this year for special needs) and called the Governor's office in our state on dfcs!

Comments

cant win for losin's picture

OMG I cannot believe how much of a mess all of this is!!!!!!!!!!

I'm curious, are you happy with your attorney? Cause honestly it just seems like he is not being "aggressive" enough.

I dunno. I'm not a legal person so I'm sure there are stupid reasons for all the things they are doing in certain ways. It just seems like someone would be like, "whoa this kid is really freaking out about all this. Let's get him with his dad asap." Ya know?

I'm sorry you are all going through this.

whatwasithinkin's picture

Oh Pixie I am so sorry for you and DH and mostly that little boy everytime I read more. who is most equipped to take care of that child more then a bio parent who loves them....DH is more engaged then any Dad here, I wish they would give him a shot at this, and give SS a shot at getting the love and support he needs.

how is keeping him away with strangers and in and out of facilities helping him....

pixiedust10's picture

Actually, we really like the attorney. Especially after things went down the way they did with the tpo getting dropped. It's not really him not being agressive, it's more of the judge was unavailable, or the clerk didn't schedule the case properly once, or the most recent before the kids were taken away was that dfcs wasn't done with their investigation (come to find out they just kept screening it out of the system), so it's not the attorney, it's honestly all the screwups between the courts and dfcs and now they are hard core covering themselves because they know they messed up. Even after the kids were taken, FDH should have been able to at least speak to the kids MUCH sooner than he did, and it was two weeks before he was.

I feel like it's really hard to get a kid taken away from their mom. I think some people can't believe the things a mother would do or say to their kids. The therapist SS7 had saw and heard it all, and knew that BM was saying she was going to try to move, try to get SS's "special better treatment" in other states, was asked by BM to fill out a form so she could get disability for the kids, even though neither is disabled, and blames everything on FDH, but she was too worried about getting sued to even say anything unless she had to, which after numerous duckings, she was finally forced by the GAL to turn over her documents, and that's when we found out how bad it was emotionally for those kids. That's when the GAL started to see our side of things, and of course after BM yelled at her when she called for the original consultation and has refused to pay a dime to her.

cant win for losin's picture

Goodness. SMH

I have no words at times over some of the situations that i read on these boards. This is one of them times.

Hugs and prayers sent your way.

pixiedust10's picture

They figure since there was an allegation against FDH (the ONLY allegation EVER, FDH had never been in any trouble ever except traffic tickets) and all these against her, that they have to cover themselves as to not get in trouble. The DA was furious two weeks ago, which is why the case got moved to superior and the kids finally got taken from her, but I guess they have to make absolutely sure FDH is a model person before they remotely consider giving him the kids. I hope the social workers documentation will be helpful, as the GAL recommendations. But right now it looks like the DA is throwing around his weight making sure they don't look bad.

BSgoinon's picture

I can't believe what a mess this has turned in to. Those poor kids. I just want to hug them. Sending my prayers out your way still. This has to be so difficult on all of you.

pixiedust10's picture

I can see where the DA is coming from, it's just damn frustrating...

FDH is on board with WHATEVER the court asks of him. He's already seen a shrink to get an anger evaluation, he took parenting classes for the divorce and she didn't, and he'll take it again if they ask.

I just got mad that DA says 'each parent got a chance' when clearly, that is not the case, hence why we have been trying to get custody for seventeen months. BM has tried to go behind attorneys/school/therapist/FDH's back to control as much as she can. At least now they are seeing it. We've never had anyone other than cops at our house, and I will welcome a house check from dfcs when all 4 kids are there and it's a circus just to see the difference in our home from BM's