DH had SD13 and SS10 and has 50/50 week on week off custody with BM. BM has been on a PAS campaign for at least 6 months or so and it has worked wonders on SD!! She is uncooperative and defiant. Lies and steals. Tells DH she hates him as often as she can and says she hates it here and wants to live with her mom all the time at least twice a day. Basically does everything she can to show she won't follow any rules we have. He has always maintained that less than 50/50 was not an option. I don't know what's happened in the past month but SD has amped it up! It's ridiculous and the stress in the house gave me a 4 day migraine. DH finally told me he's seriously considering letting her live with her mom full time after she's gone to a couple more counseling sessions with him. He thinks it's important she goes at least one more time because he's said she's not moving out of here because he's not giving up on her so we need to make sure it's understood that's not necessarily what is happening. We just can't have a household where everyone is miserable (including her, so it seems) because of her behavior when it's flat out unnecessary.

Here's what's happened this week
she's taken the bus home from school instead of going to boys and girls club and lied about how/why it happened
she's stolen her laptop out of the hiding spot DH had it in and hid it herself
she's gotten the wifi password off the router after DH said she couldn't have it (for her iPod after she lost her cel phone due to attitude)
she's called me a liar to my face during a conversation we were trying to have with her (untrue and didn't go over well)
she argues with DH every time he speaks to her
she's unfriended my DD from FB and said it was because I've unfriended and blocked her (I did this months ago because she'd read things on my page, make assumptions they were about her and then not talk to me about them) - I know big deal but just another example of how she's withdrawing from our family.
Hmmm... Those are the big ones that are sticking out for me.

My suggestions to DH are that he go ahead and allow it but enforce that she is to come over for visitation on the weekends when SS10 is here during his week (so every other weekend) but what else should he add to this agreement with BM? Poor guy is really not great at thinking on his feet so we're going to have to have it all outlined before he presents it to her.

This just sucks. After the bus incident he called the transportation office to verify her story and was told "huh, she shouldn't have ridden the bus to your house anyway, her address was changed to BM's rental property address within walking distance recently so she's not eligible for bus transportation without a note anyway. They've definitely had a plan for awhile now.