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Pecanflower's Blog

I seriously fucked up this weekend

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Chalk it up to being at the end of my rope for too long.
Chalk it up to being short on the prozac.
Chalk it up to needing a day of solitude for over 6 weeks and just never being able to work it out.

But I went into full on bitch mode Sunday. Was trying to hold a fun conversation with SS14 (who for once wasn't talking about video games or some weird fantasy thing that I can never follow) and 60 seconds into it he said, "Okay, Pecan. I Don't want to talk about this anymore." And dismissed me.

What I have learned after 5 years of being CUSTODIAL StepMom

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A mother/parent who loves her/his children will phone them on days other than just holidays.

A mother/parent who loves her/his children will provide some sort of support or nurturing to her son.

A mother/parent who loves her/his children will not use them to get attention from charities while never seeing the children herself.

I told DH that we were DONE doing anything for BM

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The waste of human DNA that is the BM texted DH yesterday. She has finally sent off the package of Christmas presents to my Son (SS14). She told DH that she threw some gift bags and tissue paper in there too; and asked if he would make sure they were wrapped up and presentable for SS14.

WHAT THE FLYING FARTS?

Okay, not only did you scam a charity to get gifts to give your Son; not only did you send them a month LATE; but you couldn't even be bothered to wrap them yourself? And you expect us to wrap them and make them presentable for your son...

I am without words BM EPITOME of sick.

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:sick:

So BM calls DH today. Christmas gifts to SS14 will be late this year (Standard Operating Procedure from this waste of human DNA). But get this...

OMG I am so mad; and sick to my stomach; and just livid. I can barely relate this...

How did she get his gifts this year?

She used the fact that SS14 has autism and that she is needy to get "adopted" by one of those charities that does such things. She does nothing to support SS14. She lives over 1000 a miles away. She doesn't do anything to help him with his Autism. She is using it...using him...

Today is our Anniversary.

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We've been married for 5 years today. I am the one who pushed for us to make it official because...Tax breaks for me. I do love him. But I didn't need the Official Marriage Designation...Until I realized I was paying for and supporting all and needed the ability to claim it on my taxes..so we got married right before the end of the year. Sounds so...cold...but it wasn't.

This is what he posted today on facebook.

Do they really know me? Probably not.

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So DH and I have been Married for 5 years this month...or is it 6? I'll have to look at the marriage license to know for sure because one day melts into the next; one year into another.

DH has MS and Autism. So, while he is high functioning on the spectrum and his MS is manageable; I am a caregiver much of the time. DH is a stay at home dad...disabled because of the MS. But he does try very hard to create something, anything that contributes. He has written several fantasy novels and has created a board game. But gaining the interest to turn it profitable has been a challenge.

Therapist changes but good news still.

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Well, we got good news/bad news from SS14's emotional therapist last night. She will be moving on to other pastures. (This happens a lot, as this is a college town and many interns and residents work with the therapist groups in the area.)We will miss her. She has been very helpful. SS14 has learned to manage his anger much better. He also has learned to express his emotions and identify them. This is a big thing for Autistic Kiddos. Sometimes they just have all these FEELINGS but no way to express.

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